Fire Company PSA
 

Shot all off the shoulder at a recent demonstration. VIVIDRGB pre set with film effect added in Apple's Color. Still a rough cut.

http://www.vimeo.com/876228

UPDATE: The video at this link has now been made private. Thanks all for comments.

Spelling
 

Check your spelling. The text that says "Thousands more are permanintly... " the word is permanently.

Also "41% of all traffic accident deaths" is not a complete sentence.

Actually most all the white text on black cuts didn't have a good feel... but that's just me :) Maybe something as simple as letting audio continue would smooth things out?

Spelling
 

Rougher cut than I thought ;) Thanks for catching that spelling mistake Steve. Several people missed it.

Bill, we wanted a disjointed feeling . . . like a traffic accident . . . not "smooth", but perhaps it's not working.

I got the idea you were going for but the execution is a bit off. Not sure exactly what it is but I think it's the pacing. Maybe the cuts need to be faster? I did notice one of the video scenes where the woman is behind the wheel, was much longer than the others which disrupts the pacing I was anticipating another text screen but it didn't come when expected.

Might try some intense blue / grey color grading... Cool colors tend to invoke fear while warmer colors tend to invoke happiness and comfort... Just a thought to really help push it over the edge a little bit...

audio continuity
 

This is actually a very good idea. It gives the piece continuity and keeps us focused on the accident scene and its cause.

Thanks Steve, you got the idea of what we were trying to do.

For what it's worth, we've been experimenting and have noticed an interesting effect. Changing the text seems to greatly effect the perception of the pacing of the cuts event though the time is not changed. . . we think because of the time it takes to read the text.

Shorter text lengthens the perceived time, longer text shortens the perceived time.

Adding text to the 41% card seemed to improve the pacing of that cut even though there was no real time change.