First stylized fight sequences (experimental) with a bit of a twist...
 

Enjoy! Please comment:

"Vengeance in 2 Minutes" This one was cut short due to an unexpected time constraint (one of the actors had to leave, so we had to kill him off sooner than originally desired, so the fight sequence is really really short, starting at about 1:13): YouTube - Vengeance in 2 Minutes - MCC Cinema Society

"Hall of Wrath" This one we began shooting a week later and was extremely difficult as I had to act, direct, and help choreograph. The fight sequence starts right within the first 30secs, the opening is brief, NO DIALOGUE: YouTube - The Hall of Wrath - MCC Cinema Society

You have a really good idea here
 

and the fight sequences are something to be proud of. What I really want to encourage you to do is pay attention to is the acting. Root your performances in the idea that what is transpiring on screen is genuinely deadly - the comedy will still be there. Right now, you're still winking at the audience. I think your ideas about what you want to do and your ability to tell a story is developed to the point where you need to take the next step. Let me be clear - the pieces are charming and funny, but I, a complete stranger, can feel that you are just nibbling. You need a bigger hunk of meat to sink your chompers into.

Good luck with what you're doing. I suspect you have some genuine ability. Work it.

Thank you! And you are very right, it is time to get some real story in. The point of shooting these was primarily to see if we even had the right ideas of how to shoot fights and not let them look fake, these were the test runs where if we screw up, at least it's not for something huge, that would be bad. But this is the end of experimental fights, we are now going to focus on story, and polishing all other aspects (lighting, sound, etc.)

Your choreography, shooting and editing
 

on the fight sequences is in pretty good order. I wish I was around to help. I'll be interested to see what you do next. If you need script help, don't hesitate to contact me.

Awesome! I'll PM you my email address!