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Old November 29th, 2006, 08:25 AM   #1
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House Call - 5 minute short

Hi all,

I'm looking for feedback on the rough cut of my second film, House Call. This is a 5 minute short about Dr. Michael Brooks, a family man and doctor.

Shot in one day with Panasonic GS400, Rode VideoMic, Britek lights and Home Depot work light.

The audio has not be touched.

http://web.mac.com/brian.andrews29/i...se%20Call.html
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Old November 29th, 2006, 08:55 AM   #2
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Hi Brian,

I don t have much time for comments. uhmm,...you definitely need to get back to the '180degree rule' when you cut from shot to another. There's room for improvement there. Another really important thing... never, ever, use the camera in auto mode when shooting a fiction. The GS400 give you the opportunity to choose your aperture and your shutter speed and to LOCK them. Use it ! In your 'interior car shot' this mistake is obvious and it scream 'amateur'...

Nice work overall though considering it's your 2nd film. Keep it up!

Phil

P.S. I didn't quite get the story/point...but that might be me because i was paying attention to the technical side...
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Old December 2nd, 2006, 12:48 PM   #3
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Hey man. The film was nice. I thought some of the cuts in the beginning of the movie was a bit much. To me, they was happening to fast. Also, you might want to consider this for the future. On that last scene, i can see the light in the back of the window so just make sure that next time you reconize that before you shoot the scene. Plus i didnt like the shot of the wife in the kitchen when she was making a salad. maybe when she answers the phone you couldve panned up to her face. You dont want to be sitting there staring at a bowl of salad.

Other than that very good work for your second film. Good Job!!!
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Old December 2nd, 2006, 03:21 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Derrick A.Jones
Plus i didnt like the shot of the wife in the kitchen when she was making a salad. maybe when she answers the phone you couldve panned up to her face. You dont want to be sitting there staring at a bowl of salad.
That's because it's his second wife. Creepy idea of a guy with two families, especially with one in a cushier house.
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Old December 2nd, 2006, 03:33 PM   #5
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I was thinking of the technical aspects of the video and it took a split second to realize that the second wife was a second wife. Maybe a blonde next time?

I understand now the setup of why he couldn't pick up his first kid, but it wasn't clear to me that he wasn't coming home... maybe I missed it?
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Old December 3rd, 2006, 01:05 AM   #6
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Thanks so much for the comments everyone. I really apprieciate it.

Yeah, it seems that the whole point of the movie is not really coming across well. I've shown it to friends and family and they seem to get confused also. Maybe if I move the flashback to the morning woman over the evening woman's close-up?

I don't want to hit the viewer over the head but the point of the movie is supposed to be that Dr. Michael is this great guy--a great, caring doctor, a family man...but he is actually pretty evil. The morning woman is the "other woman" and evening woman is the real wife.

I have like five takes with the light in the window. I thought I cut it out but I'll check again. I have a few options on some of the bad cuts. I didn't think I broke the 180 degree rule (crossed the line) but maybe I did...is there a specific example?

The in the car scene was not on auto but I didn't white balance and I couldn't figure out how to fix the backlight issue. Color correction helps that out a bit--CC was not in this clip. I may cut that scene out and just use his voice.
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Old January 1st, 2007, 11:15 PM   #7
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Wow

I really liked the idea you were going with man, lemme break my thoughts down:

Such a great storyline, and it was great at the end to realize that he had two seperate families. You're audio really turned out nicely, it was almost TOO crisp at points, if there is such a thing. Some things I would change, I would have more coverage shots for the dialogue scenes, for the scene in the parking lot especially it seemed like you had the one closeup of the chick and a long shot of the two of them, you gotta get another angle (following the 180 rule of course) with the other person in the conversation. I love films that patch things up at the end like yours did with the plot twist, a way i would have done it would have been like voiceovers overlapping the action of him hugging and that chick or whatever, and then have some cuts of his other family or something. all in all i really liked it dude, keep it up and PM me when you post another film
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