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Taking Care of Business
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Old July 6th, 2005, 10:57 PM   #76
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Yup folks. Spend $5000 on gear and you can work for . . . . $6/hr! Hey, if you're good you can get more responsibilities! Knowing that the cost of living in NYC is on the high side I'd guess you'd only get $3 for Florida. Now I included the contact email just incase you might want to send your resume.

Does McD's now require I buy my own broiler for the burger flipping job?


Seeking cameraperson with own equip. (high-quality DV, lighting, mic) for metro NY-area documentaries. Responsibilities could expand as project develops. Email resume to film@tuffcity.com. No phone calls please.

this is in or around Manhattan
Compensation: $6/hour
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Old July 7th, 2005, 12:08 AM   #77
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Another utterly ridiculous offer. Thanks for that one Craig! Ha ha ha!!
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Old July 10th, 2005, 06:25 PM   #78
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The whole crew with gear is an internship. Now that's an interesting angle. Be sure to check out the last line. I made it bold so it would be easier to see. Ha ha ha ha.!!!!!!

"Music Video for major new artist this weekend.

Crew needed: Camera person (with 24P camera)
AC
Lighting
AD
Audio

Extras: that look between the ages of 11 and 20.
Male & Female
DJ


Job location is Atlanta

Compensation: Experienced 24P Camera person - Contact us. Extras & Crew - no compensation

This is an internship job"
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Old July 20th, 2005, 01:07 PM   #79
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Quote:
Must have experience using Panasonic HD Varicam.
Must be willing to accept payment of 100/day.
Will extend your Varicam knowledge by three weeks of work.
Will have access to your footage.
Will be able to cut your reel together at our state-of-the art editorial facility for free.
Not to stand in defense of the vast majority of "job offers" which are indeed ruthless and insulting to experienced professionals, but this looks like a good deal in my mind.

Earlier this year I attended a three day VariCamp workshop (www.hdexpo.net) and am reasonably familiar with the operations of this camera, at least enough to qualify for the technical aspects of this job. Perhaps my discipline as a cinematographer needs further refinement to be trusted with such a high calibar production, however, the ad only specifies "experience" with the camera... and that I do have.

The way I look at it: they are providing a $1000/day camera rental for three weeks use. In return, and in addition to a minimalist stipend, they offer access to all raw footage and an HD post facility for cutting a yourself a reel! ... in HD!

If what this ad offers is legit, then this might be a good opportunity for the right person. . . I would take it in a NY minute, anyways.

Brian
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 07:40 AM   #80
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This one takes the cake!

Ridiculous? More like living in a fantasy world if you ask me, but check out this "job offer", hot off of mandy.com!
Payment is on a lo/no/deferred basis.

" Hi, Iím looking for someone who would like to do camera work for a new professional hero reality show I am creating. This is basically just a real life super hero show (except the heroes donít have super powers, since that is only in comic books and stuff whereas this is real life) which follows the adventures of real heroes fighting real villains and saving the day in real life.

Examples of things we will do are looking for villains by hanging out in the worst neighborhoods/ghettos of New York at 2AM or so where weíll no doubt run into some villains such as gangs or muggers or crooks, and then we can defeat them and raise our prestige and maybe get some headlines. We could also say rescue people from burning buildings by just hanging out around the fire station and quickly jumping on the fire truck and then running in the building before the fire department can block it off. Then Iíll save some kid and win the key to the city, or something along those lines.

Unfortunately right now I canít offer much pay, as Iím just doing this on my own with my own camera equipment and am doing everything out of my own pocket. For example, my budget is so low that although Iím a knight errant I canít afford real metal armor so Iím just using plastic armor from the Halloween store for the time being, which is doubly bad for me cause now if I get stabbed my armor will do nothing to protect me and Iíll probably just bleed to death. Well maybe the stabber will miss my arteries so thatís what Iím counting on. "
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 07:49 AM   #81
 
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Keith, I hope this guy, and his foolish cameraman, have their wills in order!

Jay
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 07:51 AM   #82
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I would love to follow them, just to catch the results on my cam!
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 09:28 AM   #83
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That one had me going until I got to the plastic armor bit.

It ain't ridiculous unless it's legitimate!
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 10:46 AM   #84
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Quote:
I would love to follow them, just to catch the results on my cam!

Yes...it would be excellent to be the camera guy...who do follows the camera guy who actually takes a job like that. Of course considering the insanity which they intend to produce...perhaps its good to get a good extreme telephoto lens.
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 11:07 AM   #85
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This sounds like a show for Sally or Ricki Lake. The next thing you know when he realizes he can't do the rescue thing he'll want to try to slay some dragons with his plastic sword. Maybe the Sci Fi channel would be interested in his idea.
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 12:13 PM   #86
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I'm with Chris. . .


I think that's a joke ad.
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 03:38 PM   #87
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This is his website, detailing his quest-
http://www.heroicdestinysquad.com/index.html

I laughed my ass off... in a really sad way.
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 06:22 PM   #88
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I think his site is a riot. Had a few good out-loud laughs just now while browsing it. Check this out:

http://www.heroicdestinysquad.com/ju...y/ayerhyne.htm

"Who rules the universe? Who is the creator of this reality that weíre in? Is this world just a byproduct of natural forces, or is it created by some sort of intelligent force? The answer is it was in fact created by an intelligent superior being, and that beingís name is Ayer Hyne. Ayer Hyne is a cyborg T-Rex with one real eye and one shiny red electronic eye, and machine guns for arms. He is also the creator of this world and the ruler of all reality."

The rest of that page is pretty interesting. I'm convinced that whoever is behind this was inspired by the brlliant "Ninja -- Real Ultimate Power" site at http://www.realultimatepower.net/. It's bizarreness is astonishing. Your friend here is just a wannabe in comparison.
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 06:33 PM   #89
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HEY! My friends may have played D&D, but they are nowhere near as geeky as this guy... who is NOT my friend! hehehe

I just happened to find it in my daily search for work, and thought enough of y'all to share it :)
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Old July 22nd, 2005, 07:04 PM   #90
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Hurd
The rest of that page is pretty interesting. I'm convinced that whoever is behind this was inspired by the brlliant "Ninja -- Real Ultimate Power" site at http://www.realultimatepower.net/. It's bizarreness is astonishing. Your friend here is just a wannabe in comparison.
Proof that nothing good can come from a 13 year old with unfettered access to the internet during a summer school "Build Your Own Website" class.
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