National TV Spot Constructive Criticism

[Brock Burwell]

I am currently working on a national TV spot for my university to be played during our athletic games this upcoming school year. They will likely also use this when they need a quick commercial to be used on pages on the website or any digital marketing that they plan to use.

While it's not finished (I still need to fix sound effects, add in the final voice over artist and license the music), the commercial has been completely shot and wrapped filming. I could go back in and shoot more scenes if it feels necessary.

Knowing all of that, I would love some feedback on what you think about it.

- What works?
- What doesn't work?
- Does the story of this video make sense?

Anything you can provide would be helpful! I don't make these types of videos often and it's the first proper TV commercial that I have ever made that I actually went out and shot every single frame for the intent of it being a TV spot.

Thanks for any feedback you are willing to provide.

This is Marshall - YouTube

[Doug Jensen]

It looks great, and I really like the editing, but . . . it tells me absolutely nothing about the school itself. It could have been about any girl at any school. For that reason, I would say it fails as a promotional piece. Ultimately, commercials, infomercials, promotional videos, training videos, etc., have to be judged by whether they accomplish the purpose they were created for. I’m not completely sure what the intended purpose of this commercial was, but I assume it was to attract potential students and encourage them to consider attending the school. If that’s the goal, do you honestly think it achieves it? Or am I misunderstanding the intended purpose?

In other words, a video that wins awards or garners praise from viewers isn't enough. It must accomplish something for the organization that commissioned it's production, or it is a failure.

Just my two cents. It looks great.

[Allan Black]

Hi Brock, I agree with Doug, your footage looks great. Now find out what the other Uni’s are doing, then imagine your 30sec tv spot appearing in a group of 4 loud retail tv commercials in prime time, so I think you need a good positive male voice over to keep up in all those cases.

I looked Marshall Uni up, it’s co-ed so you need more male students, maybe in small groups of both together. At the finish have a male and female student smiling to each other then at the camera.

Years ago I worked on tv spots and made some for Newcastle hospital. I was told many young teenage nurses were looking for a doctor as a potential husband and even though they’re all still students, at Marshall with the older girls I think the same is probably similar with the handsome guys who have rich parents.

19year old girls, phew! At Ncle hospital some were watching my crew.

Cheers.