DVC 5 Feedback - No Other
 

So I'm a couple hours late to the party. I had an appointment to get my teeth cleaned, sue me.

While I go watch the other three films released so far (and provide what feedback I can), I'm anxious to collect everyone's thoughts on my little movie. Good? Bad? Ugly?

Good movie, Robert. I'm having a tough time figuring out the last scene. What's the reflection of in the van windows? I related to the story real well. Mothers....whaddaya gonna do? Anyway, nice job.

Geez, I've seen the first four entries and already I feel like they are four better (and FAR better) than mine! Very impressive, indeed.

That's my feeling. My skill level is no where near what has been displayed so far. School is in session for me and my little film.

Yeah, the few people who've seen it have all said the same thing, that the last shot doesn't work. Glad to see someone actually noticed the reflection of anything in the van window, however; most people don't even see it. I can't tell you what it is without spoiling the film here, suffice it to say it apparently changes the meaning of the whole thing once you see it. I'm told if you pause the video you can make it out, maybe give that a shot.

The angle is bad, and the whole idea may just be far too dramatic and gimmicky for someone at my level of experience, or lack thereof. But hey, that's what these contests are for. I'll do a better job next time, with any luck.

Hi Robert -

This was a nice film! A mother passing away and the son has big time regrets? Oh yeah! Strikes a cord with me.

Your lighting set up for the family was excellent. It looks as though you mixed natural and studio light brilliantly. Well done.

Wasn't sure what the main character was looking at all that time. Was there a reflection in the van window? Or was this guy having an internal debate about going into a hospital/morgue to identify his mother's body with his dad? And in the end, elected not to go in.

Nice one

PS: I just had my teeth cleaned too. How bizarre! :)

Best wishes~
Bradley

I thought I saw something else in the window. I'll have to go back and look at it again. Hey, maybe thats another good thing about the film, it means different things to different people.

I was wondering about that -- I replayed that last shot several times when I watched it, but I'm still not sure I know what to look for. I see a tree and the building behind the van, and maybe something in the tree, but couldn't really make it out. Maybe it's because I downloaded the low-res version?

Heh heh...funny you mention that, 'cause the stained glass light hanging over the table is the only light I used, aside from the daylight coming through the door behind us. Shot that scene immediately after the shots during breakfast, with only a quick costume change and a white blanket stapled (yes, stapled) to the wall over the sliding glass door. Plus that wicker-lookin' divider thingie. Helped make the birthday scene look like it took place later in the day, I think.

Yep, that's right! It's not as bright or obvious as I'd hoped, but it's there, and it's visible if you look for it. Of course, one shouldn't have to sit with his audience and explain this stuff after the film's over, so I'm guessing it wasn't a very good idea.

Thanks for the reply, I'll be over to your thread in a few minutes!

Okay, what I thought was there, was there, and I think I understand what was being contemplated at the van, with all the flashbacks having come before. Right ? I think it did work okay. I don't want to give it away, but I thought it was pretty clear the first time through...

That's absolutely right, Chris, I am indeed thinking what you think I'm thinking.

Aha! I saw it Robert.

No need to say it wasn't a good idea. It was! All it needs is a new shot with the van windows and the reflection within-moving slowly by. Maybe the footage could be slowed down to 30-50% motion speed?

The fact that the main character was contemplating something came through very clear! And yes- your parents did a wonderful job!

Best wishes~
Bradley

it's a huge challenge you put before yourself, to do a dramatic film in five minutes. huge. action-adventure yes, humor yes. these lend themselves more easily to a short subject. but to take on someone's regrets over the loss of a parent in five (5!) minutes--to review a life, that's something. to try to do something profound with an ultra-short, you should be commended.

i know from the previous threads how you sweated this one, and now i understand why. i think it came together pretty well (though i will have to go back for another look at the reflection in the van, too).

your parents are pretty darn good actors, for parents....i could never have coaxed such convincing performances out of my own, god rest their souls. i was pretty moved just by the fact that you took this on....

Yes, Meryem, they did a wonderful job, and I thank you on their behalf (I'll pass your compliment along). Little in the way of acting in this film, however, as what you saw was pretty much the real deal. That conversation about the coat is one my mother and I have every winter.

A bit of trivia about the last scene with my mother, she thought the "useless emotion" line was completely unnatural, and began laughing a matter of frames after placing her hand on my shoulder in that take. I think it sounds fine, and she did well for herself.

It's really amazing what the camera does to the acting, though; every take I thought sounded ridiculous on "location" sounded perfectly natural in post, while some of the so-called "good" stuff was loaded with cheese.

Robert,

Initially, I though it looked good, but didn't quite get the meaning.

After a second viewing, and a still on the last shot, the whole thing got an extra positive note in my head. The concept looks darn good, the lighting inhouse looks great, and contrats to your parents!

Maybe if the van would move a bit slower in the last scene, or if the object was more vivid, it would have been more obvious. But, then again, is obviousness the goal in cinema?

Best

Hugo

Hugo, I'm with you on that point, but that van's got some transmission, lemme tell ya. I get in, start it up, throw it in Drive, and away we go! To go any slower than I did would require braking, which to me would seem out of place. I've just decided to leave, if you see my brake lights it might seem disorienting--"Did he change his mind AGAIN? What's happening?"

I'm thinking up ways around it, though, in case the occasion ever calls to reshoot that scene. Maybe push/pull it with another vehicle, that might help sell the effect of driving away slowly.

Very nicely done, Robert. A lot of people do this--reflect on how they could have "put up" with someone better or been nicer while the person was alive. I thought you did a good job of pulling that off in a short amount of time.

As for the last scene, it's obvious something is there; that's when a pause button comes in real handy. :)

Think I'll give my folks a call...

Ahh, now I get it. I never saw it until it was brought up. I was trying to figure out what you were looking at. I thought at first it was a hospital. I liked the pace of the story. I thought your parents did a great job at acting too. I can say it does make you want to give your mom a call. nice job.

Well Rob, I apologize for I guess not paying as much attention on that last shot as I should have. . .I totally missed it on the first watch, and watching it again while paying extra attention to that last shot makes me go "ohhhhhhh" haha. It was really well done, I enjoyed it. Nice work! The parents did a stellar job and I thought the "useless emotion" line sounded natural. *thumbs up*

I too missed the shot at the end on the first viewing. :(

Nice work in general. One suggestion for next time: a little music can go a long way, especially for a film like yours with a lot of quiet, introspective shots.

Thanks,
Bill

Hey -- I watched the film again too and saw it, definitely makes a lot more sense now.

I think of the four today yours was the one that went the deepest -- it's good to have some laughs and stuff, but it's also good to reflect on what's really important in life (sometimes relationships, or even life itself!) and it's good to see someone doing that. Don't feel bad about that last shot -- that happens to everyone at some point on some level. Good job on putting it together and making something deep and meaningful. You're a thoughtful guy and that shows through loud and clear.

I thank you most sincerely, Philip, I'm deeply moved. "Thoughtful guy", that's a new one. I hate to let such compliments go to my head, but they really mean a lot, and I do appreciate them.

I can't forget that this is still the first day, at least in my timezone. Who knows what tomorrow's gonna bring? And there's always your film. "Hmm," I wonder quietly to myself, "is Philip trying to get on my good side so I vote for his film?" :P I do look forward to it, and all the others. A board this size, with this kind of talent, and "went the deepest" is sure not to last very long.

But then, I'm not being very gracious in accepting kind words, am I? I'll just repeat my "thank you" and leave it at that.

Robert

I missed the reflection in the van window, and without it, I was puzzled at the ending.

All these D.P types call out the lighting, but as an actor, I tend to be amused by the relatinships. My favorite part was the breakfast dialog. "You say that all the time,"
"Yeah, and I'm right."
"Do what you want to do."

That's New York love baby!

It was a good piece but I too missed the last reflection shot. I couldn't tell what it was when I looked at it again, either.

LOL -- that's pretty funny! I hadn't thought of that... My point was that the other three are pushing things a little, hard to connect with on a very personal level (I've never been a vampire), whereas yours was about a guy and his relationship with his mother, and he's upset that he failed her just before she died. I can relate to that on a personal level because I really don't have a good relationship with my parents, especially my mother.

I liked it too. Acting and composition aside, the story is a common one and that's not a bad thing. If you can get the audience to relate I think that's good. Sadly, I think a lot of us can realte to this one. We all have regrets / guilt.

Nice job.

Sean McHenry

I was also confused by the ending. I've reviewed the final shot over and over (the wmv version), and I don't know if I'm just missing it, or if I'm imagining things in the reflection. Is there a rhymes-with-moose in the tree? (Hopefully, I didn't spoil that for anyone.)

The only criticism I had is that there wasn't a lot of close-ups. Most of the shots are long or medium, with the closest being a 2-way between the son and the father. For some of the introspective shots, I would've like to have seen more of the main character's eyes -- perhaps even a reflection of what he's looking at in his glasses. (But that's just a personal preference.) Some of the long shots (like the dinner table or the phone call at the couch) also had lots of head space, but I didn't know if that was intentional or not.

What I'm digging about the DV challenge is that a lot of people are doing dramas or poetic pieces. Which can be really hard to do right without being overwrought. So far, everyone's nailing it nicely.

Yes, Robert, there is. I'm thinking it wasn't lit properly, and with some decent lights and/or reflectors, I could've made it stand out more (or just some different framing--it's a bit low on the van's window as it is).

I wanted to grab some closeups of myself while standing around, and I do feel distant from the story without them, but didn't get any for some reason. I think it was because I got too obsessed with the little details; the scene is supposed to be set out in a field somewhere, or in a secluded place, and I was worried that closeups would reveal the house in the background (our neighbors', for the record). Some of the shots do that anyway, however, and no one seems terribly put off by it.

I considered eyeglass reflections as a possible alternative when reworking the scene, as my first idea didn't work out. I had planned to have the camera face the van head-on (this is before I decided on a location for those shots), with my character standing on the opposite side of the screen. The film was to be closed up with a dramatic dolly move as I entered the truck, with the vehicle and the reflection sliding into view, explaining the whole story. That was out, for various reasons, not the least of which was the lack of a good location for that. Every other potential angle shows the surroundings, our yard, and wouldn't have looked the way I wanted it to, so I was stuck with what you see. I've got a handful of behind-the-scenes photos, if you guys are interested, that show exactly what the camera would have seen from any other point.

The headroom in the shots you mention comes partly because I was worried about standing up: if I framed the shot for myself sitting on the couch, with no headroom, I'd be cut off when I stood up, and that's no good. Better coverage would have helped there, and let me pace the scene much more convincingly as well, unfortunately I didn't adequately plan this production. I also couldn't operate my own camera, so I sort of eyeballed the framing. My father worked as my stand in for those scenes, but we're not exactly the same height, so I may not have compensated well enough. I shot 4:3, so I could always adjust the shots later on, but that might eliminate the bottom of some shots...the "footroom", I guess. Too much on top, not enough on the bottom, I'd have to reshoot again to get everything right.

I mean, I've read "Shot by Shot" a dozen times over, why didn't I get this stuff right the first time? It's frustrating to know I should've known better.

I wouldn't worry about it. I've read Shot by Shot too, and I always make so-called "mistakes" while shooting. It happens -- there's just a lot of stuff to keep in your head, especially when pressed for time. Trust me, I wish I had shot some things differently on my short. I use Vegas a lot, to zoom in on footage, and make my compositions tighter, to correct my screw-ups on the shoot.

But honestly, yours is a *solid* film. My criticisms are rather minor.

"Solid." I like that, thanks. Your criticisms may not be that important to you, but anything that helps me make better movies is pretty major in my book. I'll do my best to reciprocate once your film is released.

Something I forgot to do earlier: bonus points to anyone who knows where I got the title for the movie.

Robert:
 

Your movie powerfully showed me what my life's mantra has been since November, 2004:

Tomorrow is promised to no one.

Thank you for your message. I felt your sadness. Your movie had the same feel as the original "In Cold Blood" starring Robert Blake, lensed by Conrad Hall. I want to say that your movie had an organic quality and an unsettling eeriness to it. Gosh, I hope that is what you were going for because if it was, you scored a bullseye.

I recently lost my mother and your move paralelled a moment in my life with her. A day before she suddenly died, she called my home late one night and asked if I would bring her a sandwich. Now, normally I would have done that except that she lived about 25 minutes from me and I had just fallen asleep due to the hour's lateness. In a groggy voice I told her I would bring her a sandwich tomorrow. She was dead the next day.

So yeah, your movie hurt like that. Thank you being brave and tackling such a topic.

Well, to be honest, I hoped the movie wouldn't exactly seem happy-go-lucky, but beyond that, I didn't plan the "eerie" part. I'm happy it came off that way, as it is appropriate, but it seems I've simply stumbled onto a good thing. I get the feeling if I try to go for a certain mood when making a film, I'm going to fail, but if I just concentrate on making the various aspects of production--visuals, sounds, editing, and so on--appropriate, the rest will fall into place naturally. Thank you for your comments.

I'm very sorry to hear about your mother, you have my most sincere condolences; I'd hoped people would understand the feelings in the film, but didn't mean to hit so close to home. I suppose that's a good thing, in a way, but I still feel strange that someone has had an experience so similar to the one presented here.

I'm sure she understands about the sandwich.

Robert, remember this: People always find something personal in others' work. You did a fine job. Be proud.

I liked this one because of the chemistry between characters, I find it quite well done, probably because there is a real chemistry anyway (I assume they are your real family). I like in the beginning, the typical mom-son argument :)

As for the end, if there is anything reflexting (not perfectly sure about that) it should be more obvious somehow as it would really conclude the short nicely on it's own.