Effects that blew chunks
 

In contrast to Michael's thread inviting folks to share thoughts on effects that blew you away, I will start this one for the opposite end of the spectrum and invite readers to share thoughts on effects that were used in such a way as to become a major distraction in viewing the movie, or illustrated very poor direction or production value...efx that while watching them, felt like an indictment because you belong to a civilization for which this drivel was intended. Effects that sucked....

I will throw out a couple;

Other than the 'brides' I didn't find much in "Van Helsing" of any redeeming value. The most distracting effect for me was the stage coach over the gorge scene, during which all laws of physics and gravity do not apply.


OMG! How about that surfing scene from "Escape from LA"...I was so embarrassed for humanity.

-Jon

I actually had to stop watching Bruce Almighty because everything looked so damned green screened.

Of course, the legendary rock throwing scene from Gangs of New York.

Truthfully, and I may get flamed here, but I have a problem with a lot of the latest Star Wars stuff. Especially the physics involved, or lack thereof. I know Lucas has commented on this fact by saying that it's fantasy and not sci-fi,
but LOTR was fantasy and at least things acted in a reasonable manner.

ALmost all of the Matrix.

(Yeah, sue me.)

haha, I totally agree with you on that one

I hated "The Mask" effects... I know its old, but it came on TV recently and it was hard to watch

Terminator 3 - some movies should just stop after one sequel....

Actually I thought the long car chase in that film was pretty impressive. And I believe I read that none of it was done with cgi. The rest of it was pretty forgettable though...

I only saw the trailer of Sounds of Thunder, but even that made me really really laugh with the fx...

How about this one... Slither. It came on as a preview during a recent movie I saw in the theater

http://www.apple.com/trailers/universal/slither/

I honestly can't tell if its supposed to be horror... or humor?? haha

Matrix Reloaded - Burly Brawl
It looked so fake. They needed doubles for Agent Smiths and in many shots you know it isn't Hugo Weaving. Neo looked CG in many of the shots. It bothered me when they did slow motion so you really noticed how fake it was.

I did like the The Matrix and its bullet time.

Episode III
So many shots looked fake. Even backgrounds looked fake. Yoda looks over animated.

2001
The effects were the shot. And the last 20 minutes was a waste (Ooh, pretty colors).
All of 2001 was explained better in the first minutes of 2010.

Stargate SG-1 has good effects. Stargate Atlantis screws up green screen.

The Kong
 

Steady yourselves...for I am about to deride the work of the Kong...

Not the big gorailla, rather Peter Jackson, in his movie ABOUT the big gorilla.

So much was wonderful...the city streets at the beginning...the vaudeville theatre at the end....omg...the Empire State in the final reel...long overdue homage to the masters who had practised his craft in its earliest decades....but by crikey...the DIPLODOCUS!!!!

You could see the little people running THROUGH their legs!!!

Oddly enough....I watched Jurassic park recently (my gf had never seen it!) and I still think those dino's haven't been beaten onscreen since they were in multiplexes. Although I appreciate most were not cg...which speaks volumes.

James Bond wind-surfing on the ice flow tidal wave in "Die Another Day"... worst shot in any bond film ever (and thats saying something).

Spot on! I totally agree with that. This was one of the recent glaring examples of something that the viewer subconsciously "knows" and feels is impossible and ludicrous.

And for a Bond-film, it is compounded by the fact that it isn't a stunt double performing it. It might as well be one of those corny rear projection deals of someone on a surfboard pretending to surf.

I was never that impressed with the "Spiderman" movie effects. I think he looks "over-computer generated".... but with such great "stories" I'm willing to overlook that. Maybe its the the "coloring" of his costume that looks cartoonish and fake to me at all times. And it looks like they worked to match the actual real costume colors, (worn by the actor), to the cartoonish computer generated colors instead of vise versa. I am a big fan of these movies though.

How about the good ole original "Star Trek" episodes. I loved that series when I was a kid growing up, but some of it does fly in the face of some pretty well established, fundamental laws of physics. For example, the "hand phaser" simply erased matter completely from existence (fundamental law of physics cast to the wind there!), but not only that, somehow the beam was highly intelligent too, knowing to erase the target's clothing from existence as well (without even slightly scorching the ground that the victim stood on!). Amazing weapon! Never made me hurl, but I did laugh sometimes.

My first thought was that James Bond thing indeed. How bad.

However, I recently fast-forwarded through Mysterious Island. Unbelievable how bad those effects (and the movie) where. Yikes.

second on Jackson's Kong.
I didn't like Return of the King either.
I've always thought the key to making not so good special effects look great was the quick cut. It seems that in the case of these movies, though, the key to maiking adequate effects look bad is to do shot after lingering shot of them. Return of the king actually made me feel a bit sick while i was watching it in the theatre.

You also need to see the 1961 version of Mysterious Island: http://imdb.com/title/tt0055207/?fr=...c=1;ft=20;fm=1

Effects by Ray Harryhausen - the giant crab is my favorite ;-) All the same, I actually own this DVD and enjoy watching it from time to time purely from nostalgia after watching the original as a kid...

Here ya go - click on the "crab" link: http://www.chinesejetpilot.com/index.php?ID=202#

Sound of Thunder
 

Dude,.....Sound of Thunder was awful. There are scenes where they are obviously walking on treadmills in front of greenscreen,....and they didn't even match up the speed of the people walking to passing background. the rest of the movie was pretty awful as well.

The first film version of "Dune". Terrible!

The giant sandworm looks like a modified vacuum hose being dragged through the sand.

And in one of the scenes where the highliner is in orbit around a planet, there's a huge clot of dust flying in formation with it. Of course these spaceships look a lot like pictures of spaceships being moved around like flat animation cels -- which is exactly what they are.

Overall the movie absolutely sucked.

On the other hand, the best space effects I've ever seen is in Kubrick's "2001". Even the scene in which Bowman blows himself into the airlock there's absolutely no sound as the exploding bolts go off -- because there's no air to conduct sound waves!

Boyd: that's pretty bad indeed. On the 2005 version I often had a feeling they
used paper cut-outs or something....

Jumanji! Great movie, one of my favorites, but the animals look terrible to the point of laughability.

Escape from LA anyone? The surfing scene was incredibly cliche and awful looking.

the trouble with cg effects is that their always looking better cause of advancements in technoligy, well technicly they are (i don't much care for most cg)

I guess budget plays into this big time, cause a movie like "the black hole" is truely awful effects, but it's not a big budget flix. Where as the latest star wars films are big buget, but the effects are #1 lame-o. The effects really weren't really any better then the first 2 1/2 movies (i don't coun't the ewok battle). (Ok look fights the green screen in jabbas palace is a bit dated, but so what).

Oh yeah, 1970's king kong, a man in a gorilla outfit looks like a man in a gorilla oufit, you might as well watch "mighty peaking man", it looks to be the same level of effects, but cheaper budget

What? You didn't like the production values in Escape from LA???

I agree that the new Star Wars films were terrible. I admire what they were able to acheive with CGI, but it gives the whole film a comic book, phony appearance. And the theory that "more is better" wears thin very quickly.

Michael Bay's "The Island" and that stupid two person flying motorcycle thing. What makes me laugh is when I listened to the director's comments, there's Mr. Bay himself saying the studio thought the thing was cheesy. He goes on to defend the thing and there it is, right in your face cheese.

escape form la was a crappy movie all around. Shows what happens when you take a b movie director (and lest face it, carpenter made much better low "b" movies) and give them alot of money. Escape from l.a had to of been what, 20x the budget of escape from n.y, and with out a doubt, escape from n.y is the better movie.

so budget does not dertimin effects value. I hate this new green screne background thing, not because it's cg, but because it always looks like the actors are on a stage4 with a picture behind them. I saw sin city, that was not very enjoyable, and didn't do anything to impress me.

Anyway, put me down for "final fantasy the spirit within" it;s all cg and it's horrible. Wnat good special effects on a budget, get Avalon by mamoru oshii

Actually, I laughed and laughed. It made it seem worth it to watch Snake and Peter Fonda surfing.

I referenced Escape from LA in the first post....as a sort of inspiration to start this whole thread in the first place. Something about the surfing scene that was so disastrously comical made it look like Kurt and Peter were inches away from breaking out into some type of Frankie and Annette duet. It was just too freakin' funny.
-Jon

Whoops, I skipped right over your post! Sorry about that.
10 years ago when I first saw it in the theaters, I was actually impressed by the effects! How about that? Anyway, not too long ago, I actually read somewhere that Carpenter actually didn't want to do a sequel, but the studio was kinda forcing him into it, so he made it almost like a parody of itself. I'm not sure about the credibility of that, but that's what I heard.

I greatly disliked the Scorpion King in the Mummy Returns.

I dont like dissing movie effects because much of the time the FX people have to work on tight deadlines--with little money. In the last 25 years--a huge reason for the existence of the blockbuster is because of the injection of A budget money into fx budgets and set piece sequences.

Very few people could do even 10 percent of the work a Ray Harryhausen did.

It also requires a great deal of artistic skill and knowledge to create something as simple as a foam creature suit. Stan Winston was able to direct a decent movie Pumpkinhead, but could Lucas or Spielberg sculpt and mold a predator costume? The results would be scary.

Jurassic Park's effects hold up in terms of dinosaur movement--but some sequences have a "gamish" look-especially the daylight stampede sequence. Very digital. Plus--in the final scene--the blur effects are not consistent with animals that would be so large. But in 93, no one would have noticed it, just as in 33 no one thought King Kong was jerky.

Terminator 3 had great effects--and as a sequel to a sequel I thought it was pretty solid--I expected much worse. The acting was good(except for the TX girl--but she wasnt supposed to be Meryl Streep), the plot took interesting turns. The Terminator was a lot less cutesy than he was in T2. But the movie didnt have the epic feel one would expect. Poor Cameron though--he does all that work to have a happy ending and it gets blown to bits--just like in Alien 3.

I think that was the point. It was self-parody.

JAWS!!!!! The shark looks so FAKE. That’s probably why it isn’t seen until the last 30 minutes.

with jaws they were lucky, the shark did look really bad. But it was breaking down so often that they couldn't use it alot acttually, speilburgo claimed he didn't use it duee to his maser film skills (yeah right). But by not useing the shark so much, the movie holds up 9the cheap shark robot would date the movie big time)

Star Wars epidodes 1-3.
Geoge Lucas ruined everything.
God I hate that stupid man

honesty, thats what this web board is all about.

I have a dog named "Chunks"

On physics in space movies...

Star Wars physics, Star Trek physics, Serenitiy physics, Mission to Mars physics, The Red Planet physics, Lost In Space physics, Armageddon physics... the list goes on and on, are all completely ridiculous.

The only movies that stand out in my mind as having some accurate astrophysics are 2001 and Apollo 13.

It's pointless to nitpick about a single phaser from the old Star Treck or the mechanics in the new Star Wars' when the physics are absolutely absurd on a much more fundamental level.

Basically, any film in which a spacecraft's engines are running to keep it moving (as though it were a car), are as unrealistic as dropping an apple and having it fall up.

You can't push a spaceships stick left, and have the ship bank and actually fly in that direction as though it were a plane.

Gahh.

Thing like this, I believe, are one reason popular culture has so little concept of science. It's amazing how few people even have a basic concept of scale (duh... which is bigger, the sun or the moon? Hmm... they both take up the same portion of the sky, so they must be the same size! duuhhh...)

On a slightly different note, did anyone see in the new Poseidon Adventure the diesel fuel spilling through the theatre, or whatever it was? The camera tilted to follow it down as it fell through the room which made the liquid not move relative to the camera... so it looked like a drawing of a blob of water which was just stretched in photoshop. It absolutely looked like a cartoon... I was embarrased for the people who made the movie.

Its an endemic problem in scifi TV and film.

I saw an episode of a show called John Doh!, OK, it wasn't called that but it should have been.

It starts with the abduction of people by a classic bad guy with chloroform. In a full size welding tank on wheels with the word 'chloroform' stenciled on the side. Good old John, who is tracking down the missing people, happens to know everything, except who he is and where he came from and with the aid of his vast knowledge tracks them down to an abandoned warehouse. Apparently this psycho bad guy lost his entire family in an accident and is abducting the perfect members to replace them, where he plans to keep them all locked up and live like a family happily ever after. The inner door where the psycho is keeping the people is locked and on discovery, fearing that his new family is going to be taken away from him, he decides to kill everyone by opening the valve on the welding tank full of 'chloroform'. Fortunately for them, John knows everything, and uses his lighter on the sprinkler above his head which sets off all the sprinklers in the building including the ones in the locked room. John explains that since chloroform is soluble in water, that this will remove it from the air. Our bad guy apparently knows this too and takes hold of the mask on the end of hose, straps it to his face and begins breathing heavily, our guy John and sidekick break into the room just after our psycho expires. He has fallen on his sword so to speak and left no loose ends or anything that might creep over into the next episode, like a trial.

Where can you even begin?

You have the absurdity of someone lugging round a welding tank in order to abduct people, which in the real world would weigh more than a person, to contain an anaesthetic that isn't actually a gas. Chloroform is a liquid, you put it on a cloth and hold it over someones mouth and nose, they breath vapours through it and lose consciousness - at a very significant risk of brain damage which is why it is no longer used. The Simpsons gets this right, Buffy the vampire slayer gets this right, apparently this is too much to double check in google for an author who's major character is an infallible expert on everything. What we do get are quips about the number of dimples on a golf ball that could have come from '1001 amazing facts'. We have the sprinklers, apparently left fully working and the water to them switched on in an abandoned factory and the usual bad cliche that if one goes off they all do. Its not like you'd only want the water to fall on the fire itself, or that water damage could cost more than the actual fire damage now is it? And then we have the whole chloroform being soluable in water thing, which it isn't, and nitrous oxide, the anaesthetic gas that does come in large tanks and is still used isn't soluable in water either.

There is amazingly poor level of science here, and from an author with the audacity to write in a character that 'knows everything' but it goes beyond science. This is some of the worst plot design of anything I've ever seen. The bad guy trying to kill his 'family' with something that has only put them to sleep before, and then conveniently killing himself with a short dose of the same. Throughout the series, which I have seen a few episodes, John Doh! meets a series of experts, policemen, detectives, forensics and ends up showing them how to do their job. At one point John, who is colourblind, has to stand in front of a line of strippers and work out what colour underwear they are wearing, with dialog like (as close as I can remember) 'and the lace are only in blue or pink, but pink is only available in a size 9 and 12 which means this must be blue', if he gets the answer wrong a psycho bad guy (a different psycho bad guy, they come in six packs), who set this up to test him, will set off a bomb by remote control. The whole program is rotten to the core, and viewers lap it up.

What most 'scifi' viewers actually want isn't scifi, its just 'scifi cult', almost like a religious cult, a safe, morally unambiguous environment for them to lose themselves in and become part of by memorizing trivial details. Almost all trek is as badly written in terms of story as it is with science. The outline is, Humans get space travel, explore the universe meet aliens who by implication have been exploring space for thousands if not hundreds of thousands of years before us and some of whom have godlike power, and morally lecture them into being better beings. Always a thinly disguised lesson by the author directly to the audience on how simple moral choices can be if you always 'do the right thing' and it will always turn out right in the end.

Serenity is a badly cliched western in space. One episode of the series I saw started off introducing us to Melinda Clarke. Now Melinda has a bit of a history with scifi/fantasy appearances. She was in the movie Spawn as a baddie and was killed off early on. She was in 'Return of the living dead III' as a good Zombie and ends up killed off. She was in the series Enterprise as a goodie and was killed off, in Tremors she was a baddie and was killed off. She was in Charmed as a baddie and was killed off. So when she turns up as a tough but honest prostitute in Firefly protecting her land and a child from the bad guys, its pretty obvious that she's going to be killed off and that this is the event that's going to provide the justification to blast the leader of the bad guys into tiny pieces. I haven't seen Firefly the movie, the trailer indicated that chief baddie is a token ethnic type with an upper class English accent who murders children. With writing this unsubtle and obvious I don't think its really worth picking out science flaws.

I saw a movie fairly recently about a spaceship that loses its oxygen tanks and communication dishes, whereupon the captain leaves in the only escape pod, but still has everything else working, water, power, propulsion and the crew spend the rest of film killing each other so they can be the one that survives with what oxygen remains in the ship. The fact that water can be split into hydrogen and oxygen with electricity does not occur to anyone and by the end of the film I would have been willing to go back in time to when the writer was a baby and shake him to death. The thing is, the entire film was badly written, not just the science, with the captain having advanced notice of the meteorite but being unable to turn the ship, he calls his lawyer to make sure he will not be personally liable and then leaves in the pod. He gets his deserts because the call to his lawyer was recorded. The acting was more than fair, the make up and special fx were decent, directing, sound. It did not scream 'low budget'. Its just written very badly, and pointing this out as just a science flaw would be overlooking so much else.

Probably the only film I've seen with a poor level of science but a really good plot was the Matrix. If you want good scifi you have to read it, pretty much how its always been. It would be nice to change this but the market simply does not care.

I still remember the horrible greenscreen of the surfing in Beach Blanket Bingo. THAT was absolutely the worst effect ;)

Thumbs down from the guy who reviews the movie based upon seeing the trailer.