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Old November 23rd, 2016, 12:30 PM   #1
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Law Firm Commercial

Put this short 30 second commercial together for an attorney here in town. I didn't want to do the typical attorney commercial with a car crashing sound in the background and all the graphics everywhere (not that I actually would know how to do that if I wanted to). He hired me for the work he's seen from me in the past, which has this kind of feel to it, so I didn't want to veer too far away from that. Thoughts?

PS - Haven't settled on this music so it still has the watermark on it.

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Old November 23rd, 2016, 02:32 PM   #2
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Re: Law Firm Commercial

2 small nit-picks

1. The audio quality is different between the main voice-over and the ending scene. It's a little jarring.
2. Driving his car... 1. He is a little too casual with one hand on the steering wheel, and no seatbelt. I don't see any connection between an Attorney for hire and driving a car. As a client, I like to imagine him either At work, or in the courtroom. But not driving a car.
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Old November 23rd, 2016, 02:52 PM   #3
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Re: Law Firm Commercial

Yea you may be right about how causal he is driving. He actually is wearing a seatbelt though (it blends into his jacket a bit).

The idea was to tell a story subliminally (driving to work, walking to work, in his office, typing on his computer). Perhaps you are right that the driving isn't necessarily needed. Thanks for the feedback!
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Old November 24th, 2016, 09:40 AM   #4
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Re: Law Firm Commercial

Not sure if its his accent but I had to listen to the opening twice to figure out it was Charleston. Obviously if its being aired locally that won't be an issue.

Nice work.
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Old November 26th, 2016, 12:33 AM   #5
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Re: Law Firm Commercial

Nice work, Brock. That was actually refreshing. I'm an attorney -- not personal injury -- and about 99% of the commercials advertising legal services make me cringe; I wonder who was making creative and substantive decisions.

Two points: the narrator swallows most endings of his sentences. I realize he likely isn't voice talent, and he likely sounds great in person, but here I had to pay close attention as his voice trailed off.

Second, he referred to "us." Small firm? If so, why not show him and his colleagues working together in a conference room or, if you can, in a staged courtroom? The group shots made me wonder whether he was speaking to clients. If these are his colleagues, it looks like they're having a casual chat about confidential client business in the open; that isn't a message I would want to telegraph to potential clients.

My $0.02.
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Old November 28th, 2016, 01:17 PM   #6
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Re: Law Firm Commercial

Great advice guys! Thanks!
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