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May 12th, 2009, 06:49 AM | #1 | |||
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May 13th, 2009, 07:22 PM | #2 |
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very average - sorry mate but that's what I thought! (still I guess you knew that)
at :29 you could have shortened that clip a little the rings at :38 don't really come up well on a dark background the shoot of the bride at 1:19 is pretty shakey What's up with the audio starting at 1:27 - sounds like she's in a toilet the shot at 1:45 of the bridal party goes on way too long at 2:24 you're getting shakey again - (maybe you're too old for this) overexposed at 2:38 I liked the cake shot at 3:10 you REALLY have got a loooong way to go! ..... okay anybody else??? - it's had 30 views so someone must have an opinion Last edited by Paul Mailath; May 13th, 2009 at 07:53 PM. |
May 13th, 2009, 08:41 PM | #3 |
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G'day Paul,
I like it how you've taken the time to critique your own work. Nice one! I keep getting interrupted so haven't had a chance to watch it all the way through yet, but when I do I'll be sure to comment & give you some feedback. I know how valuable honest, professional critiquing is. Cheers, Matt. |
May 14th, 2009, 12:52 AM | #4 |
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Hey Paul
I thought you held the opening shot a bit long, while the groom said his vows, understand the intent but for me the execution did not really work. You could have possibly overused the dissolve transition a little throughout the piece, I have used that song myself in the past and you can get some nice clean cuts to it, something to think about anyway. The processional of the attendants could have been a bit long as well. You have used a couple of snippets of natural audio with a couple of the prep shots that had no real relevance to the piece. Also need to keep an eye on your horizon, when the couple were kissing you were a little crooked. Overall the colour was a bit inconsistent, and I really don't like the zooming out shot of the glass towards the end. Your handheld camera footage as you said is a bit shaky, does your cam have an IS setting perhaps? Audio was a bit questionable particularly when the bride was speaking, at least I think it was the bride, it was very hard to tell, one thing I've learnt is that audio is often overlooked, yet it is so critical to the success of your final product. Just on audio, not sure if it really worked at the end possibly due to the sub-par quality. I'm not saying my work is up there yet, but I'm working on it, and one thing that I have learnt is that you really have to feel the music you are putting the footage to, otherwise it just becomes footage with a nice song behind it, rather than trying to assist the storytelling with a meaningful piece of music. You have got a few things to work on Paul, nothing wrong with that though, it was only #2, so good on you for putting your work up for review. Hope that is the sort of feedback you're looking for:)
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May 14th, 2009, 05:04 AM | #5 |
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Hey Paul,
Just a few comments to add to Darren's. 1.31 the shot with the groom holding his son - the white sheet on the lefthand side is somewhat distracting. The audio during this part could better have been incorporated with a scene of the bride speaking about the groom and then a flashback to the groom. 2 mins - 2.12 - be careful of your framing. There is too much head room 2.50 the transition from the buggies to the reception wasn't smooth - possibly use a straight cut Cheers |
May 14th, 2009, 07:12 AM | #6 |
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this is more like it!
Darren - I was trying to fit all the audio it but I should have cut it to the last half and make that shot shorter, I'm really struggling with straight cuts, they just don't look right - I'm not sure why. Maybe that leaning shot was due to a strong wind! I'm not good with colour and I had someone using a HV20 so I was trying to mix both - I have to work on that. The bride's audio was a bugger - I worked it as much as I could but it still sounded crap. Dean - it was a flag and that raises a really good point - I didn't think about it because I was at the wedding and knew - for anyone else it stands out. I don't mean to blame the shakey footage on someone else but I think I'll pay more and get better footage next time. I find this really helpful - you get to a point where you've watched it so many times you cant see the thing anymore - it takes a fresh eye to see the problems. |
May 14th, 2009, 09:08 AM | #7 |
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Hi Paul,
Here's what I think: 1. The bride is beautiful! 2. I find that the song gets boring on the second half way through... 3. some shaky footage, the groom holding the kid especially. second cam?? 4. for your second wedding... o my gosh! well done! Santo
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May 14th, 2009, 10:21 AM | #8 |
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I love the shot at 0:09 to 0:18. good strong intro.
My take on handheld cam is this. Handheld footage is awesome, if you do it right. At the beginning, the footage was a bit shaky, but not distracting. So it works. Other times it was shaky and it was distracting. Didn't work so well. It seems like many people have made the critiques that I would have given. I think the next time you can play around with more dynamic camera angle. Try some more wide shots. I loved the song. Totally adds to your video. Keep it up Paul! |
May 14th, 2009, 10:23 AM | #9 |
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Is it me or is there a strong Australian present in this thread?
I would love to visit that part of the world one of these days. Looks beautiful! Anthony |
May 14th, 2009, 11:07 AM | #10 |
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hey you're right! I didn't realise that.. from different states too.. hahaha..
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May 14th, 2009, 07:19 PM | #11 | |
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Quote:
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May 14th, 2009, 07:29 PM | #12 | ||
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Hi Paul,
You've got lots of timecode specific feedback thus far which will give some food for thought, so I'll offer my more general opinions. Firstly, my 'warm & cuddly' - for only your 2nd wedding, you've done really well and credit to you for putting it up for review. Onto my critique... The opening lower 3rd title was a bit corporate looking. The grooms opening vows didn't really work IMO. I'm guessing you'd cut the celebrants prompts out as the tail end of what she said was still audible on a couple of occasions. When doing this, the progression of the vows don't sound natural so I find it better to leave it as is and include the celebrants voice. Quote:
Timeshifting of events can really be hit and miss if there's no reason to it or it's random (I know from experience...). If you have a look at some of the outstanding samples on here - stillmotion, Jason Magbanua et. al. then it's amazing when done well, and there's always a reason behind each shot. Quote:
I personally include 2 versions. One 'full version', which is basically my rough cut and includes everything in it's entirety - ceremony, speeches etc. with only the natural audio from the day. Basically I just edit out all the rubbish shots. I then also include a 20-25 minute highlight version, which is edited to the couples music choices. This is obviously the one that everyone wants to watch, and they might only watch the full version once, but it's good to have nonetheless as an 'archival' version. The other thing I noticed is the cross dissolves are overused - especially for this track. I've read recently that if a scene change doesn't work without a transition then it doesn't work at all (I'm paraphrasing something along those lines anyway...) Hope that helps - my opinions only so take from them what you will. Keep up the good work! Matt. Last edited by Matt Barwick; May 14th, 2009 at 07:34 PM. Reason: addition |
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May 16th, 2009, 01:06 AM | #13 |
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thanks Matt,
good point about the title - that needs changing. The grooms vows! - he couldn't string two words together without a prompt - maybe I could have included some and shortened the whole thing. I like that saying - time to try straight cuts, I'm on a break whilst shooting a wedding today - someone actually called me a cinematographer - I nearly laughed at him. |
May 16th, 2009, 02:12 AM | #14 |
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