Wedding Nightmares. Literally!

[Ian Atkins]

Does anyone else have regular dreams about difficult wedding situations?
I quite often have nightmares that have me arriving late to a wedding, showing up without essential gear, or not getting the equipment to function correctly.
It's actually quite funny, but it surprises me how often I have these dreams! Usually, I might add, a day or so before a wedding.
I've been shooting weddings for 15 years and I still get these dreams...now more than ever!

[Dmitri Zigany]

I'd say that's stress. Or not enjoying doing them anymore. Probably both.
Almost no matter what you are doing you get these kind of dreams when stressed.

[Noa Put]

Haha, yes, I get them too and almost always at the beginning of a new wedding season and have been getting these for years now, I however don't think is has anything to do with not enjoying it anymore, it's more the nature of shooting weddings where there are no retakes and I"m sure solo shooters suffer more from this because they have to be on their toes all day long.

Before the wedding season starts I need to get into that routine again and it takes me a few weddings before I feel comfortable with what I"m doing and I think that first period is what triggers the dreams.

[Chris Harding]

Hey Ian

So stressing and having nightmares helps with your wedding?? Of course not! Stop worrying and start enjoying weddings ...if you totally screw up (which is highly unlikely) the worst that can happen is that you refund the client. Going into a wedding stress free means that you are not likely to make silly mistakes but if you are stressed to the max you might be so uptight that you make errors that normally you would never make ... If something goes wrong you simply take the best corrective action at the time and the bride probably won't even notice!! Multiple cameras is a good safeguard and I always put a GoPro on a lighting stand and let it run ... I seldom use the footage BUT if I forgot to push record on the main camera I have something to work with ... same goes for audio ...even the mic on the main camera is better than no audio at all! Take the attitude .."I will do my best but I'm not going to panic ..it's only a wedding!!!"

R E L A X !!!

Chris

[Steve Burkett]

Chris, I don't think Ian is actually claiming stress and in desperate need of a pep talk. Just noting he has dreams about screwing up a Wedding. I have similar dreams. Now some people if not all have had the 'gone out without any clothes on' dream at some point, does this mean they're hyper stressed about dressing in the morning. Of course not; it's just the sub conscious playing out silly scenarios. Sometimes I get the messing up Wedding dream and I've no upcoming Weddings, so I put it down to the fact that I'm a bit behind with my editing work or that I'm anxious about something else that's being played out in my sleep with Wedding work. Dreams shouldn't be taken literally.

[Peter Rush]

Every couple of weeks I have one - usually about being late for the ceremony or speeches and missing it completely! TBH the day itself can be quite stressful - especially this coming Saturday's wedding with a nightmare vicar that I posted about yesterday. That was already going to be a difficult one but is now more so!

Last night I was stressing over it but now I've just come back from a very long dog walk on a beautiful sunny morning and i'm OK - it is what it is - I have no control over it, but it does mean because of a PITA vicar I have no safety net which still worries me.

[Roger Gunkel]

I occasionally have dreams about both wedding shoots and live music gigs, where I arrive late, or am missing vital equipment etc. This is after over 2000 weddings and 5000+ music gigs where I have never arrived late or forgotten vital gear. I always arrive early to allow for the unforeseen and always carry spare equipment.

From what I have read and heard over the years, the dreams are just our brain's way of looking at various situations and subconscious minor worries that we all have. Whenever I have the dreams, I always have a bit of a chuckle in the morning at how odd they are and how those situations never happen in reality. It's probably some sort of self checking process, and I have to add that I never get anxious or nervous about any filming of gigging jobs and never have.

Roger

[Chris Harding]

Hey Steve

Ian never mentioned stress, Dmitri did ... I used to stress big time before weddings and decided I was just being silly! The old saying "If you worry you die ..if you don't worry you still die so why worry" came to mind so I stopped stressing ... I think if you convince yourself hard enough that something will go wrong it probably will so it's far better to go in with a optimistic attitude and only tackle issue IF they arise and they probably won't!!

Imagine my situation this Saturday ..wedding is at 4:00pm ..full Catholic Mass and it gets dark here at 5:15pm !!! Now ... we are doing video and photos PLUS we have a massive cold front heading towards the coast due to hit mid Saturday with forecast rain between 50 and 100mm ... our usual rain is 10 -20mm !!

Whether I worry about it or not it's gonna happen so I'll just make the best of it!!

Chris

[Steve Burkett]

Well I must admit not agreeing with Dmitri's assessment. I've had the Ceremony going wrong dream, yet oddly on the day it is the Speeches that are most likely to catch me out as in starting before I'm ready, and in terms of stress, it's the bloody drive to the venue that causes me the most. Yet I've never dreamt about either Speeches or the drive. Only the Ceremony. I think we all have some concerns over failure and not unreasonable to see them played out in our minds with scenarios concerning our work.

[Ian Atkins]

Who knew we were all amateur psychologists! LOL

I will be honest and say that weddings do stress me out. Absolutely. I think that anyone who takes this work seriously will admit to that. But, many things in life that I enjoy and love stress me out. That includes my own kids! :) In other words, just because wedding videography is a source of stress doesn't mean that also isn't a great source of joy for me. In fact, the love of this work far outweighs any negative impact.

I think most have hit the nail on the head when they have mentioned that there is a lot on our minds when it comes to producing quality wedding films. And if you are like me, it is quite often on your mind. So while I am no dream expert, perhaps this is our brain's way to help categorize, file, and process all the many pieces of the puzzle that are involved with turning over a consistently well-produced product.

In any case, I'm glad I'm not alone in these dreams!

And just for kicks, the next time I have one, I will share the details of it here : P

[Steve Burkett]

I think we can read one too many things in our dreams. A week ago I dreamt about fleeing from aliens - was it something in my psyche fearing war, perhaps concerns my business will suffer a hostile take over....

Nah, more likely one too many scifi movies combined with that spicy sauce with my chicken the night before.

[Peter Rush]

Originally Posted by Steve Burkett

it's the bloody drive to the venue that causes me the most.

Every single time Steve - gotta love those hotel weddings - no driving :)

[Don Bloom]

I never once had nightmares or dreams about a wedding I did or was about to do. I DID however have nightmares about some of the people I had to deal at weddings. I tried very hard to put them out of my mind as quickly as possible because frankly, they weren't worth losing sleep over. Shooting weddings or corporate training videos or product vids or seminars or talking heads or NASCAR event was my job. Shoot it and it's done. The next job is tomorrow.
IF I ever started to have nightmares or dreams about my job, then it would be time to get out. Fortunately I got out before that happened!

[Jeff Pulera]

I had the "arriving late to a wedding, showing up without essential gear" dream a few weeks ago...and I quit taping weddings a 3 years ago. Just shows what 20+ years of it will do to you

Jeff

[Jeff Harper]

I have them on rare occasion. I think it has to do with a person's personality. I think more high strung people (like myself) are probably more likely to have them, but I could be wrong.

I have dreamt of showing up at wrong wedding and then going from wedding to wedding, all with no gear. It was really disturbing and the dream itself bothered me so much I woke up sweating. In retrospect it is funny.