Pet Peeves in Weddings
 

I don't know about you but there some stuff in weddings that just bug me...
When I shot my last wedding, the best man thought he was a real "comedian".

This person thinks he's making funny jokes (during the best man speech, of all places) such as making sleazy comments about the grooms' past girlfriends ("how's her hip movement?") or saying sh&% or F(*& (just to say it) and laughing away with a drink in his hand.

I guess everyone wants a shot at "fame"...

Go figure...

Maybe I'm just being old fashioned and thought maybe, just maybe there's still people out there who will give an ounce of respect to people in public...

Agreed, bad language is never a substitute for real humour.

I heard of one wedding where the brides side of the family stood up and walked out whilst the best man got ever more blue jokes.

Another thing that annoys me, and I think shows real disregard for the occasion, is when someone has obviously not made the slightest bit of effort into putting together a speech. Fair enough some people HATE talking in public. Even if you do, it makes it easier if you at least have a few ideas scribbled down before the event.

My favorite hate is when a group of idiots are walking nearby when doing interviews, shouting and carrying on even when they see you working. Usually a quick wave to them will quiet them down, but I had a bridesmaid once tell me not to "shush" her ever again (she wasn't drunk from what I could tell). All this caught on tape, of course, and the grandparents I was interviewing were struggling to talk the first time, and did NOT want to re-do their congrats. I had a blast explaining that situation to the bride. "One of your bridesmaids decided to swear a lot while standing right next to me during the interview, and your grandparents didn't agree to re-do what they said. THAT'S why you don't see your grandparents' interview on the DVD." I, of course, was at fault for not fielding the area and keeping it clear of inconsiderate morons.

-Michael

That sounds like an episode from Seinfeld!

Joe

peeves but not hates.

I agree. comedians.. or wannabe comedians.. worse than that, is speeches which drag on for over half an hour.. on average speeches run for a total abotu abotu 30 to 45 mins.. but ive done weddings where ive been shooting multicam and the speeches roll out for 90 and 120mins.. by the time the cake is cut and the dancing starts, theres like an hour left..
I tell all my couples to at least count how many ppl are speaking, then to consider how much time they want to be sitting around, then calcualte THAT time by the amount of people speeking, then they know how many minutes to give each person..

other peeves..

- uncle bob with his handycam...
-uncle steve with his newly bought 300d set on auto and pissy lens shooting over my shoulder with that infernal slap slap slap as he continuously shoots in my ear...
-people asking me to tech them how to use their cameras coz its new and they dont know
- photogs and guests who step in with no regard for our positions or static camera placements (ive had photogs look directly at teh camera <tally lamp on> and jsut turn their backs to it and conitnue shooting..
- Skanky guests (as in "aussie ocker" beer swilling loudmouths (i shot a politicians daughters wedding last year and pretty much all the guests <save for the oldies> were a crowd ud find in a local pub... im not stuck up, but htis was ridiculous
- grooms that dont give a shit about whats goin on around them..
- brides that worry too much
- gorgeous intelligent brides marrying moronic deadbeats (where were they when i was single? LOL )
- another peeve is parking.. i bloody well need it

thats aobut it for now..
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Just "bleep" the specific words out... leave the rest in - that's what I would do. The family will be the only ones to see it and you most likely will never demo speeches/toasts anyway.

I guess I'm fortunate. Most everyone behaves.

I'd ask the B&G if they want that in the final product. If not, I'd dump it, or dub over his statements with audio from Mr. Roger's neighborhood.

One unbelievable set of speeches recently included the best man saying f#?& EVERY three or four words, probably to distract the viewers from his pathetic past stories of the groom, which both the bride AND groom were utterly embarrassed about.

Also, I had a wedding with about 10 speakers, each being 10+ minutes.... now, who am i gonna offend by cutting them out in the edit room?! Nope, u guessed it, I just made a point by putting them all on a separate DVD!

oh, this is obviously an English thing, but the number of weddings i've done now where a speaker will say the exact line: "Standing up and doing a speech is rather like making love to the Queen...it's an honour to do, but if you had a choice you'd rather not do it'
I promise, one day soon, i'll make a quick video-compilation of the many times i've filmed that now. My partner and I cringe every time we hear those first few words..!'

Wedding Pet Peeves
 

Ha hahaha....That is funny!

Hahahaha
you should cut it for one word from each speaker.. and have it fly through each speaker as the statement is beign said.. roflmao... put that on your website.. ROFLMAO

Peter,

I swear, if i get a chance today, i might just do that and post a link on this forum, to let you all have a laugh :)
But no, maybe i better not put it on my website...!

Smokers on the patio.

While doing quick interviews outside and away from the noise of the DJ/band the person next to my subject exhales a massive cloud of smoke right at me. I get a lung full and the field of my camera's views is totally obsured.

One of my favorites is the wedding coordinator who changes the rules on you at the last minute, regardless of what she's told you and the B/G previously.

One of the first weddings we shot, about five years ago: we showed up for the rehearsal the night before and verified that where we would be positioned would be permissible. Canon GL1 on the stage, manned by an operator, slightly hidden by some foliage if I remember correctly. 2nd cam, dolly mounted, on the floor alternating between 2-3 positions. Got approval from B/G and wedding coordinator. Well, come the day of the shoot, literally 30 minutes before the wedding starts, the coordinator shuffles up to me and says "you have to shoot from the back of the sanctuary, and the camera on the stage must be unmanned". After politely discussing the situation with her, we had no choice but to follow her 'new' rules. It was awful.

The B/G were quite surprised but completely understood that it was not our fault. They took it up with the coordinator later but didn't get any recourse.

I always make it a point in my contract that we have no control over location conditions, including working with onsite staff. We obviously fight our hardest for our client, but try to avoid causing a scene. Sometimes it is a delicate balancing act between serving your client and putting the morons in their place.

I haven't seen it on here, and maybe you guys are just a lot luckier than myself, but for the most part: photographers.

More than once I'll have an amazing shot, and the photographer stands right in it blocking everything else.

The first wedding I filmed had an AMAZING balcony around 3/4ths of the church, which was incredible! I decided to use this to my advantage, and so did the photgrapher. That's totally cool, except he kept trying to make conversation with me and some woman up there. I wanted to scream at him to shut his yapper and turn down that ridiculous electronic shutter sound that went off every 4 seconds.

I'm sorry, that wasn't nice, but they didn't seem very professional for the equipment they carried (I guess that would be a whole extra entry).

My Peeves
 

Hello all,
I've only videoed 10 weddings so far, but the same things keep on happening to me, even this early in the game.

1) Photographers getting in the way of my shot. I know if I did that to them, they would be very angry. This is very common, I'd say more than half the weddings have had situations like these.

2) Groomsmen & Bridesmaids that are rude and/or use foul language, or are uncooperative with the flow of the video, or the events of the day.

3) Grooms that do not want to be on video tape, or do not want to wear a wireless microphone. So I've put in my contract that I'm not at fault for this shy behaviour. Why would a groom hire me and not want to be on video tape, or not want to wear a microphone?

3) Wasting time trying to find out where it is that I'm supposed to be seated during the meal, and once my seat is found it facing a wall, and not the head table. Half of the weddings to not have seating charts, so it's like searching for an easter egg when I should be actually working. One wedding even failed to give me a seat at all, so I had to wait until an available seat came up... I was really upset at that one. This again is now in my contract, and I'm to be seated with the photographer or the dj.

4) Available parking. I don't know if that can be formally arranged, but it would be a nice thing. I don't have time to be searching for a place to park 2 blocks away, and then lug my gear to the ceremony on a hot day.

5) Stressed out brides. Stressed out anyone... I do understand that putting together a wedding is a difficult task, but if you plan on having a nervous breakdown, don't hire a videographer. Our jobs are hard enough...

6) Fights between family members. These people need to give their heads a shake and realize that a wedding day is not the time of family arguments.

7) Last minute cancelations. Believe it or not, I've only been the in business for one year, and I've already had this happen to me twice. I always got my money, but only after I did the contacting, and only after a brief argument. This is probably the most difficult part of being a wedding videographer.

8) Crappy gear. Ok this one was my fault. It was my very first wedding... Cringe... I had purchased a very inexpensive Sony wireless microphone, and tested it multiple times without problems. However, I did not test it during the rehearsal... Stupid me. Turns out that the location has tonnes of static interference and I didn't find out until I put it on the groom and started rolling. I totally paniced. So instead of taking the microphone off the groom (which I had time for...) I went with it hoping for the best. What ended up happening was brutal static during the ceremony and over the vows and everything. It took me over 6 months to fix it with an audio program, but it still sounded like totaly crap. Lucky for me the bride was very understanding, and even gave me a 50% tip over and beyond my initial price. Go figure... I'm surprised I'm still in this crazy game after that happened.

9) The learning curve. Ok I thought this was going to be easy to video weddings... It's not. It's hard.

That's about it for now.
Thanks
Michael

Welcome to my world.

I think my greatest pet peeve is when the bride & groom just chill out and expect magic to happen in the video.

They will sit there the whole night, talking to their friends like it was a normal party, drinking alcohol, and getting wasted.

I have seen so many great wedding videos. I believe that half the reason these videos were so great is that the bride & groom were such awesome talent. It's like they were actors.

I have only had a handful of wedding gigs where the bride & groom had a colorful attitude and actually cared about their video. These are the weddings I use for demos.

Nothing wrong with chilling out at your wedding as long as you don't mind a boring video.
-----
My other main pet peeve is the dj's at the reception. Dj's can be some of the cheesiest people alive and play the worst music for the occasion. Usually, I can tell if they are the cheesy type if they have some kind of dj nickname e.g. "dj crackers".

The additional annoyance that dj's somtimes do is put several hours between events such as the cake cutting, garter toss, etc. Nothing like wasting a whole night waiting for stuff to happen.

hers one of my biggeset peves..
chargin a client 2500... ok fair enough.. but then they have the audacity to try to bring the price down or get afew extras thrown in..
nwo thats annoying on its own accord..
But to add salt to the wound, whats worse than dealing with this is... is the same clients paying 7grand for a photographer whos only there for 8 hrs...
No question about heir price and no haggling required...

typical scenario...

Photography...
"7grand thanks"
"no worries, here you go"
See u at the wedding..

video
$2500 thanks
what?
It comes to $2500...
can i have a discount..
No

Wow, as I sit here and read through all these responses, I remember at least one time that every one of these things has happened to me. I guess if you're in this business long enough, it'll happen!

The thing that consistantly bothers me the most is the photographer who has NO consideration for me as a fellow professional. In fact, last week, the photog looked at me, saw the shot I was after, and stood right in front of my camera! Past experiences served me well, and I picked up the camera, tripod and all, and moved over. Now, I'm waiting for the bride to question that little jaunt. When she does, I'll point out what her photographer did. Video is strong evidence!

BTW, I got the shot!

Mark

never had a photog do that to me, and they know not to..
they usually only ever make the mistake once..

im a nice guy, and i will make a photogs job a joy, but if they wana be prats, they'll know about it..

I wouldn't say this is a peeve of mine (probably more so the B&G):

DJs who pretty much force the B&G to do things they don't want to at critical points, like the groom retrieving the garter belt. One DJ here refused to continue with anything until the groom used his teeth to pull the belt off her leg! I've seen it done a lot before, but this groom CLEARLY did not want to do that so he just yanked it down with his hand. The DJ then stopped the background music and told him to put it back on and "try again." The groom's face, caught on tape, of course, was not happy at all. And if that wasn't enough, imagine the poor guy who caught the belt and had to put it on the leg of the woman who caught the bouquet. I don't know about you guys, but I personally wouldn't want to use my teeth to put the garter belt on the leg of a complete stranger (unless she had premiered in a modelling magazine!)

Trying to get the B&G to do something is one thing, but one attempt should be plenty. Maybe the DJ needed new glasses or something.

-Michael

Tell me about it. Several times here in Montreal, I have seen an alternate to the usual garter toss (after the groom has removed it from the bride's leg).

The DJ gets the single guys to kneel in a circle, and pass around the garter using only their mouth until the music stops, announcing the "winner." Often, it drops to the floor at some point, and they pick it up in their mouth again.

I shudder when I imagine the sodden mess they finally end up with...

I had that happen at a phillipino wedding once.. the bride and groom were fine abotu it, but the ones who caught each respective element turned out to be ex's so it wasnt a good response when the girl was told to sit and stick her leg out while the garter was put on her leg by her ex boyfriend..

My newest problem is wedding recessions that are stopped every few seconds because the photographer is stopping the recession to snap pictures of the bridal party.

I like the flow of the recessional and by stopping it for pictures, this flow is ruined. My workaround is to get different shots with different angles and different frames and to cut to the balcony cam, but this certainly makes for a lot more work. It also throws off the arc of the ceremony.

Flower arrangers who not only:

(a) turn up at the church in the last thirty minutes before the service to decorate it (us having taken our establishing/title shots already, or course)

but also

(b) put a HUGE floor-standing flower arrangement (or two) either side of the couple's position in the church, thus obscuring the pre-arranged front camera position.

If in doubt, shoot from the aisle bro... in fact, its prolly the safest spot to be once daddy gives away his lil princess

Just a few quick peeves off the top of my head:

Kids who allowed to run rampant on the dance floor during the first dance or the parents dances; screaming and cavorting and destroying the emotion

People who walk right in front of the doors into the hall the second they are being opened to allow the B&G to enter

Parents who insist on thrusting their kids up on to the stage not just to sing one off key song, but several. One child had an entrie book of arrangements and was bascially cussing out the band for not keeping up with him. Maybe this kid was 10

A tipsy guest who all day and night bugs you to let him on camera to tell some incredibly funny story and, once you give in just to shut him up, he just stands there with the mic and yells "Hiya!"

And as for inappropriate remarks: Edited a wedding for another studio and was doing table speeches. One entire table consisted of all the groom's ex-girlfriends. They decided what they had liked about the groom .. physically .. in detail. I phone the studio and ask How much of this can I leave in? The response: Put it all in, the bride knows and doesn't care. Wow .. is that guy going to pay for the rest of his life

"I phone the studio and ask How much of this can I leave in? The response: Put it all in, the bride knows and doesn't care. Wow .. is that guy going to pay for the rest of his life"

lucky boy.. at least he got to live a little before getting the big ol ball and chain.. lol why anyone would invite their ex GF's lord only knows.. lol

I have quite a few, but here's a couple:

DJ's or band members who temporarily rotate a monitor I have mic'd, for a toast or whatever reason they seem fit... who can clearly see that a wireless handheld mic, on a stand, is pointed towards the monitor a few feet from it, & full well know it's MINE & what the purpose for it is. It doesn't matter if you mention to them from the getgo to please take a few seconds & either let me know beforehand OR simply reposition the stand so it's at least aimed toward the monitor. Oh... also... has anyone had this happen several times & you then decide... with a smile & think to yourself... "OK, enough of these mental midgets, I'm moving this to the opposite monitor"... then later, they decide it's imperative they move THAT one?

My other one... you're working a gig & you have doorways you have to pass through, yet there's people standing IN the doorway chattin' up a storm like there's no tomorrow. OK, that bugs me whether I'm working a gig or not ;)

MOOOOOOOVE IT! ahemmm

Bill

Yep, happens to me sometimes. Then they see this 235 pound guy with a videocamera coming their way and he's not stopping. Well, it's like the parting of the Red Sea...or they get run over! (politely) :-)

Totally agree with that!!
I've had grooms steal 90% of their speech from speeches on our demo DVD - none of the guests would know that ofcourse - but on the night when I hear the same lines I usually peer over at my partner on the B Cam and she's thinking the same thing I'm thinking; what a lazy bugger. The worse thing is that we're more embarassed than he is when his new wife realises he stole his lines from our demo. Eeeeeekk!!!

At the end of the day it's all part of shooting weddings, and I'm thankful I get to make my living from something I enjoy.

Cheers

"but on the night when I hear the same lines I usually peer over at my partner on the B Cam and she's thinking the same thing I'm thinking; what a lazy bugger"

LOL
Hey Paul, good to see another sydneysider :)
Check your email :)buger, i cant send you an email..
can you send me one? Im close to you and im looking for a reliable shooter for one particular wedding in April. My other guy pulled out on me
If youre intrested,, feel free to drop a line.
cheers
P

I wonder what is the logic behind people's sub/conscious thinking when they compare prices for photo & video work? I mean everybody can take a picture & get it developed, try that with a video. I just can't believe people would be ready to pay $7k for a photo shoot & not be willing to pay a 1/3 for a complete video package. Makes sense to teach your Mrs how to use a camera & offer a complete package.

"I wonder what is the logic behind people's sub/conscious thinking when they compare prices for photo & video work?"

Photography has always een considered an artform in the professional sense.. whereas video.. well, theres always been a stigma about its credibility as a form of art. Also with pictures, people have a physical album to hold onto. somethign they can grab and hang onto.. whereas with a dvd, its "new" and it doesnt carry teh kind of "physical" sentiment a photo does.
You cant place a dvd on your desk and see it and admire it, you cant pin a dvd on your wall and showcase it in your home...

theres also the issue of price..
people dont eeeeeeEXPECT video to be of high quality.. and are happy with that compromise if it saves them some cash.. BUT when they see high quality stuff, they DONT want to pay becuase they believe they can get teh same results from a dodgy handycam.. Its funny, i shoot a wedding and i use no less than 2 cameras each job.. most of teh onlookers, guests and clients are usually impressed and believe their money is well spent.. BUT the funny thing is that theyve paid a hellofalot more for their photos and the photog is using consumer gear with crap glass.. then i whip out my 5d (along with these video cameras) and only THEN do people REALLY take notice..
Its true what they say, the "bigger" the camera the more impact it has on people s perception of what you do.. Thing is, ive learnt to use the small 1/3 camcorder formfactor to my advantage and its now a marketing tool for me.

at teh end of the day, its all about attitude..
consider that 85% of weddings will have an official photographer, and of that 85%, only 15% wil have a pro video as well..
Its a HUGE market, but the statistics speak for themselves. Hence the reason why im getting back into stills.
Id rather work smarter, not harder.. and now with HD video delivery coming to the fore with PS3, justifying a price hike for this "naturally evolving" format will be very difficult as there are morons out there who are already offering HD at SD prices, simply becuase they need the folio

theyre setting a precedent which will continue to ruin the industry.. it happened with hi8, digital8, dv, and now i can clearly see it with hdv

Video just doesn't have the history - your parents don't have a wedding video or film, right ?

As for haggling, the video booking is secondary to the photo booking, and after a few vendors, the wedding financier becomes experienced as well as sensitized to cost and wanting to put up a fight with every vendor beefing up their packages to a certain pricepoint as soon as the word wedding is uttered.

As a groom going through this process myself, you see $1000 here, $1000 there, and you're wondering no one really cares that you want a simple, inexpensive wedding. You're just the guy in the dark suit in the show with the endless book of checks, all paid upfront on vendor contract terms.

Here is a sample of my thoughts yesterday :
"What !? Floorsweep flower petals will cost $100 ? You can't get them to throw them in for free or $25? Allright, I'm getting my extras from the next guy that tries to sell me something expensive. Where is that videographer ..."

Oh the fun.

If it helps you feel better, I also tortured the photographers. Many try to sell "fine art" photography to me at reasonable per hour prices, concealing their true cost structure of selling you multi-thousand dollar packages of prints that are most definitely CostCo. I want to pay them a reasonable price for their time and expertise without having the digital image files held hostage. I told them I wouldn't book them unless they had a method for me to own the digital files. Most were flabbergasted and appeared insulted. Get real. That request will be standard in short time. My future photo albums will be the laptop computer, HDTV and its "screen saver", digital picture frames, cell phone, etc.

One photographer offered processed full-rez JPG files as well as the RAW files upon my request. His on-line portfolio of over twenty weddings spoke well for him. He charged for his event time and post-processing. So, I booked him.

HD delivery
 

I don't agree, but I'm on the client side as a groom these days. The reason it happens is because it can. Manufacturers are offering you HDV products that are in the same price range as their SD counterparts of yesterday. What is the price premium on a product for more when you are equal to your competition ?

By the time you can deliver HD DVDs, the whole HDV product chain will cost the same as the SD product chain did when DVDs became a viable distribution medium. I've processed my own HDV->SD videos, and they don't take much more effort, only more of today's computer effort.

What do you think about offering more different types of distributions that actually take more effort and skill than the client can muster ? I'm talking about edits for different screen sizes, not running the project output through DVD Fab Platinum to output to iPod or PlayStationPortable.

in regard to offering hgh res raw, many photogs use the argument that they make their money by charging for prints... thing is, i been getting bookings left right and centre becuase i DONT print.. i give raws and processed Jpgs, and thats all i do..
less work, similar money and no headaches with waiting

"I don't agree, but I'm on the client side as a groom these days. The reason it happens is because it can. Manufacturers are offering you HDV products that are in the same price range as their SD counterparts of yesterday. What is the price premium on a product for more when you are equal to your competition ? "

Its not about the gear, its about the addition post processing requirements and the fact that your manufacturing more than just a simple DVD
Provide the goods in HD DVD or BD, and you must also delivery in SD. The additional encoding and hardware requirements to do this need to funded somehow.. a camera is one thing, but an entire workflow and delivery regime is another

"By the time you can deliver HD DVDs, the whole HDV product chain will cost the same as the SD product chain did when DVDs became a viable distribution medium. "

It took 4 years for DVDr to be priced at the level its at now.. burners about the same time.. in addition, its taken over 6 years for DVD to penetrate the consumer market as the "next" home theatre standard
HDV has been out now for over 2 years to those of us in the field of production, however viable delivery options have only been available for several months.. to this day HD authoring is still in the air... hell only recently did the BD consortium approve a "standard"

"What do you think about offering more different types of distributions that actually take more effort and skill than the client can muster ? "

This issue is confusion. Theyre already confused about what HD is, theyre already confused as to the compromises HDV has made to exist. They wouldnt understand the technical differences between XDcam/DVCPRohd/HDV
Most clients dont know the differences between LCd and Plasma, let alone the resolutions available, let alone the upcoming 2k and 4k res units
Most people wouldnt bother with BD or HD DVD unless they bought themselves a PS3, to which will hammer down the format as being the one of "choice" by consumers...

This debate on precedented behaviours and pricing based on formats and technology can go on and on.
But the fact remains that there are lowballers out there charging peanuts and operating at a loss to score the contract

I too deal with the photographer wanting to be in the same location in the balcony and not realizing that thier talking doesn't show up on still photos. The higher-end cameras also don't have an option to turn off the shutter sound, it's a mechanical thing, so I do my best in post to clean it up, but don't always get them all. I try to explain that it's the same as if I stood in front of thier shot and they had to Photoshop me out.