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-   -   Show Your Work 2008 (https://www.dvinfo.net/forum/show-your-work/94990-show-your-work-2008-a.html)

Rodger Smith October 26th, 2008 11:20 AM

Sara & Suzi Movie
 
Well, shot my second and last SD movie . . "Sara & Suzi"

Would love to have some people watch this little 9 min 8 sec movie and at the end, click the "Click Here" link at top of the movie page to rate the movie anonymously or ID'd . . your decision.

The link: From Trimedia Pictures "Sara & Suzi" (Then Click "Watch The Movie")

BACKGROUND

The movie was produced for film festivals and has already been entered in several, none of which have ended judging yet.

The movie was shot with one DVX100B camera in 16:9 Squeeze @ 24p and edited on Avid Liquid Pro. An upconverted HD version was also produced but basically is just an SD image in HD size. I figured that's what we'd see but hey, it was fun thinking it might work :o)

For those who check the movie out, thank you in advance for watching it, and we hope you enjoy it as much as we did making it.

AND, please rate the movie and don't feel you have to be kind, if something is amiss, I'd love to know it. I want to be a better Director and Producer and I will when I correct my weaknesses but to do so, I have to know where they are.

Ali Jafri October 28th, 2008 02:01 AM

you better sit down for this Rodger
 
Okay so I watched it. I must confess it didn't choke me up. Since you've already completed it I guess there's not much point in suggesting any changes, so I'll just comment on what I personally felt about the short.

Firstly, its commendable that you actually went out and got something done. I know most of us (including myself) just build castles in the sky most of the time. But perhaps its because whatever we take out, we want it to be perfect - and sometimes perfection is not what's required, sometimes its more important to communicate what's on your mind.

I thought the story could have gone deeper. I didn't see any sibling rivalry though, I saw more regret and self-blame. I liked part where Suzi removes the crust of the bread, its a little characteristic that helps identify with the character more.

Overall though, I thought the story felt more like a road safety public service message. I'm sorry if that sounded harsh, but you did post your film up for comments. I'm just being honest.

Technically, the camera brought too much attention to itself. There were too many zooms which always makes any production look like a vacation home video. Some places it felt like you'd used a NG take, in others it felt that you're still adjusting the camera while the story is progressing. These aren't good filming techniques. Editing could have been a lot slicker too.

Rodger, I just think that you can still learn a lot. I admire your drive and interest in this field but I would hold back on tags such as "award winning", "dramatic narrative", "film festival", "starring...", etc etc. They're just Hollywood buzz words that won't improve on an otherwise mediocre production. I would have enjoyed it so much more if you'd been a little more humble about this short and used it as a learning experience, seeking constructive criticism to build your portfolio and your experience to make better and better productions. I just felt that its presentation was too pompous. I'm sorry, but that's what I feel.

I would love to see your next production and sincerely hope that you haven't been deterred by my seemingly harsh criticism. Believe me, I'm much harsher on myself about my own work. I think it just helps to make on a better person and professional.

On an ending note, I thought the young lady that played Suzi did an outstanding job :)

Cheers!

Ali Jafri October 28th, 2008 05:27 AM

music video up for comments and criticism
 
Hey guys. I thought I should get some feedback for this music video I've done. I won't say much to influence your judgment, just see and let me know what you guys think.

Sailing Fast on Vimeo

Once you're on my Vimeo page do feel free to browse through all my other work. Lemme know if something catches your eye.

Ali Jafri October 28th, 2008 05:30 AM

its only fair
 
Rodger, I'll tell you what. Just to be fair I've posted up a music video that I did and have invited everyone to offer comments and criticisms on it. I'm looking forward to your post as well. God help me!

Matthew Johnston October 28th, 2008 11:16 AM

No comments?

Ali Jafri October 28th, 2008 12:14 PM

Very nice :) I love how it doesn't try too hard to drive a point across. I'm sure all kids have such vivid imaginations, and this short reminds us how it was to be a child again :) know its predictable but I'm guessing it was never meant to be a suspense film in the first place! Plus, I enjoyed knowing what was going to happen, THAT's the whole charm of the film isn't it?

Excellent shots and framing. Everything draws into the story. Please do tell us what camera you used and what you did your post on. Where was this filmed by the way? Love the location and the sets.

All in all, nice work :)

Dylan Couper October 28th, 2008 02:44 PM

Comments from a WRC fan.

Loved the photography. Liked the editing.

However, you need way more music to keep people's attention and energy through some of the spots where there is no dialogue. I think you could cut about 50% of the footage too, down to what the viewer NEEDS to see, rather than all the good footage you shot. It was very slow, to the point where I started skipping forward a minute at a time. After more than 5 seconds, in car driving footage is boring as sin unless you are going through some ridiculously twisty roads at terminal speeds with cliffs around every cornoer.

Having said that, I think you'll have a really great piece if you chop it down and speed up the scenes where stuff actually happens. And pumping music.

Matthew Johnston October 28th, 2008 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dylan Couper (Post 956777)
Comments from a WRC fan.

Loved the photography. Liked the editing.

However, you need way more music to keep people's attention and energy through some of the spots where there is no dialogue. I think you could cut about 50% of the footage too, down to what the viewer NEEDS to see, rather than all the good footage you shot. It was very slow, to the point where I started skipping forward a minute at a time. After more than 5 seconds, in car driving footage is boring as sin unless you are going through some ridiculously twisty roads at terminal speeds with cliffs around every cornoer.

Having said that, I think you'll have a really great piece if you chop it down and speed up the scenes where stuff actually happens. And pumping music.

Thanks for the words. I wanted to ad lots more music, but I don't violate copyright and don't have that much $$ for licensing. The 3 tracks I did use were licensed from Rumblefish BTW.

Point taken on the length. It is too long.

Ivo van Aart October 29th, 2008 01:43 AM

Thank you all for the posts!

I'm glad my intentions worked! This was shot on a Sony Z1 (the DP I worked with has his background in television) with some minor color grading in post on fcp. The location was in Holland (I guess you could see that :p) just outside the city of Breda.

I'm glad you all liked it!

Andy Graham October 29th, 2008 10:21 AM

I liked it, it cheered me up

Andy.

Tim Bickford October 29th, 2008 02:59 PM

FYI-

This video was shot in HDV with a Canon XL H1. I used the 6X Canon lense. Also, the green screen keying was all done with Ultra-2. I edited the skit with Premiere pro CS3 using Cineform AVI files.

Some interesting facts about the video.

1) Contestants and judges were shot on seperate days

2) Cowboy interview in front of the doors was actually done on green screen. I a frame of video of the doors and used it under the key.

3) Some of the intro shots were from 2007 and were shot with a Canon XL2.

Nick Royer October 29th, 2008 10:02 PM

Intervention - Stephen
 
This weekend we decided to have some fun and make a spoof of the popular A&E television show, Intervention. In this 'episode', Stephen, a die-hard World of Warcraft player, is faced with an intervention from his friends Nick and Taran.

YouTube - Intervention - Stephen

We created this short video for a youth film competition at a local church. Please send any feedback, keeping in mind that this is a bit of a rushed project. Thank you.

Ken Lamug October 30th, 2008 09:58 AM

UPDATE:

November 6th 2008 - Official Selection to the High Desert International Film Fest.... Visit our site for more info!

Dylan Couper October 30th, 2008 01:53 PM

Congrats!

That's an impressive amount of work for a small crew and $2000!

Paul Whittington October 30th, 2008 02:20 PM

The Carved Pumpkin
 
Hello everyone,
Well I managed to complete my latest film just in time for Halloween - it's called 'The Carved Pumpkin' and I hope it gets you in the Halloween spirit!
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=Ni4f7omHg7A


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