The Tragedy of Canada

[Frank Granovski]

Actually, I'm Canadian, and I hate jokes directed at us, the USA, or anywhere. People are people, even in Afghanistan.

Hmmm, and I'm from Winnipeg too. One Winnipeger owns and runs TV stations around the world, including in New Zealand and Australia. "Let's make a deal"...Winnipeg style. (Probably no one got that one.)

A lot of American bombs and rockets are made in Winnipeg. Even Little Boy (or is it Fat Boy?) parts were made there.

Texas, Texas Chainsaw Massacre? (I liked that movie. Very strange.)

Canadian actors? If you knew how many and which ones, it would make your head spin.

Do Americans know who own E-bay? (A nice "couple" from one of Bush's "axis of evil nations!"

French Technology, Canadian Style? How about the Bombardier Group. You know what they invented, and what they make today, right? No?

Don't forget at one time Canada made better fighter jets than America...but then America got worried and convinced the lame Canadian Government to scrap the project, among others, and go for that lame missile defense net. So..., the poor Canadian scientists all moved on to NASA, Boeing and---what's that big one in Texas that seemed to have disappeared? hehehe....

[Bill Ravens]

well, here's one for ya.........

On the sixth day God turned to Archangel Gabriel and said: "Today I am going to create a land called Canada, it will be a land of outstanding natural beauty. It shall have tall majestic mountains full of mountain goats and eagles, beautiful sparkling lakes bountiful with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs over-looking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon."

God continued, "I shall make the land rich in oil so as to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, and they shall be known as the most friendly people on the earth."

"But Lord," asked Gabriel, "don't you think you are being too generous to these Canadians?"

"Not really," replied God, "just wait and see the neighbours I am going to give them."

[Nathan Gifford]

I think the question was (from Monty Python, "What is the terminal airspeed velocity on an unladen swallow"

I guess the question is whether the Canadians love Spam as much as the Brits do?

[Alexander McLeod]

<<<-- Originally posted by Chris Hurd : I've forgotten what the Empire's mission is... to keep England British, or to keep Britain English? I suspect the latter.

Many Americans wonder why the packaging and instructions for most consumer appliances (washing machines, televisions, etc.) are printed in French... it's because the same goods are shipped to Canada. The concept is lost on 95% of all U.S. citizens, I bet. -->>>

I think you are being kind about (aboot?) the 95%. Probably much higher. It reminds me of the old joke told in Whistler about the tourist from somewhere in the UK (it could have been in the US and is often told that way) who changed his money to pounds since he was going to British Columbia.
Sandy

[Edward Tune]

Was working with some Brit techs a few years back on a tape transport system. One of 'em stated that we needed to remove the jubilee clip.

Of course I gave him the look of "What the heck are you talking about?"

He pointed and I said "Oh, the hose clamp." He said "No, the jubilee clip!"

I told him us Americans called it a hose clamp and he said "Well, yes, that is what it DOES, but it is CALLED a jubilee clip."

"OK, OK, OK, I'll remove the jubilee clip.....!"

So guys, make sure you use the 'proper names' for all these little bits and pieces we have here in the video world.....

Have a Merry Christmas!

[John Locke]

<<Adrian: You must be confusing Jennifer Connelly with Neve Campbell.
The former being born and raised in New York.>>

I stand corrected about Jennifer's home country, Adrian...but...Pamela and Natasha still earn Canada enough credit to take up the slack.

[Frank Granovski]

Canadians DO NOT like Spam. We eat what Americans eat. The USA and Canada used to be one giant terrtory under the British thumb. Now the USA ain't, and Canada has two thumbs pressing down. That's we Canadians like to stick the middle finger up. (I case you don't know, I'm joking.)

By the way, Winnipeg, Manitoba is often called, "Winterpeg Mosquitoba." (You figure it out.)

[Peter Lock]

Ah, Spam & Chips (Fries to you guys), washed down with a glass of warm english Ale, Now thats cooking, the French don't know what thier missing.
Come to think of it when you guys sit down tomorrow for your Xmas dinner think about where the Turkey & Potatoes come from.
Merry Christmas.
Peter.

[Jeff Donald]

I think they come from big ranches in Montana. Everyone know there's no turkeys in Texas.

Jeff

[Richard Alvarez]

"No turkeys in Texas..."

Thats right, we sent them all to Washington.
(Hey, if you don't like political jokes, don't vote for them)

And here's two great "Americans" who never were. John Wayne, and Peter Jennings...

I love Canada. I spent a week there one day.
No kidding.

I hitch-hiked across Canada, from BC to... some small town near International Falls, back in the '70's. (Wouldn't do it now) For three days I walked along an empty stretch of the trans-can in Sasketchewan (sp?)

And I thought Texas was flat.

Of course here in Houston we say the only thing between a Canadian Cold front and the gulf coast is a barbed wire fence.

Merry Christmas to all...

Bill

[Nathan Gifford]

And to think this all got started because Chris lost the XL-1 Doberman Watchdog in Winnipeg...

[Joe Carney]

Frank....
>> How about the Bombardier Group. You know what they invented, and what they make today, right? No?<<
The Bombardier is a large seaplane based on a 50 year old American design (Grumann or Boeing I can't remember which). It's been updated quite a bit over the years.
It's popular with firefighting services around the world. It has the unique ability to skim across the water and fill it's tanks without stopping. The fill the tanks while skimming the water part is what the Canadians invented.

Yes, I get the Discovery Wings channel.
Yes, I know the discovery channel is Canadian owned.
They are part of the same group that owns the History channel.
Like the History channel, if it wasn't for found WWII footage, they wouldn't have enough material to stay on the air.
Their programming sucks more and more with each passing year.


They only decent thing they have is is 'A Plane is born' and 'A Chopper is born' series. Both English. Both about building your own plane/ or helicopter from a kit. Very cool stuff.

[Frank Granovski]

Bombardier invented the Skido and Seado. That's also their brand names. They also make high speed trains and private jets (mainly for Americans). I feel the same way about A&E. CNN? Don't even go there.... I do like PBS, however, but so far this year they couldn't afford to get those new English mysterious---in fact, not even the old ones! Keep in mind that Canadian television is moulded from American television, so now you have your answer/s!

[Joe Carney]

>>Keep in mind that Canadian television is moulded from American television<<

And you admitted that in public? wow, how humble of you.
hehehe.

[Dylan Couper]

Wow, I go out of town for 3 days and look what I miss!