Ridiculous Job Offers / Demands!!

Craig Seeman · July 6th, 2005, 09:57 PM

Yup folks. Spend $5000 on gear and you can work for . . . . $6/hr! Hey, if you're good you can get more responsibilities! Knowing that the cost of living in NYC is on the high side I'd guess you'd only get $3 for Florida. Now I included the contact email just incase you might want to send your resume.

Does McD's now require I buy my own broiler for the burger flipping job?

Seeking cameraperson with own equip. (high-quality DV, lighting, mic) for metro NY-area documentaries. Responsibilities could expand as project develops. Email resume to film@tuffcity.com. No phone calls please.

this is in or around Manhattan
Compensation: $6/hour

James Emory · July 6th, 2005, 11:08 PM

Another utterly ridiculous offer. Thanks for that one Craig! Ha ha ha!!

James Emory · July 10th, 2005, 05:25 PM

The whole crew with gear is an internship. Now that's an interesting angle. Be sure to check out the last line. I made it bold so it would be easier to see. Ha ha ha ha.!!!!!!

"Music Video for major new artist this weekend.

Crew needed: Camera person (with 24P camera)
AC
Lighting
AD
Audio

Extras: that look between the ages of 11 and 20.
Male & Female
DJ

Job location is Atlanta

Compensation: Experienced 24P Camera person - Contact us. Extras & Crew - no compensation

This is an internship job"

Brian Wells · July 20th, 2005, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Must have experience using Panasonic HD Varicam.
Must be willing to accept payment of 100/day.
Will extend your Varicam knowledge by three weeks of work.
Will have access to your footage.
Will be able to cut your reel together at our state-of-the art editorial facility for free.

Not to stand in defense of the vast majority of "job offers" which are indeed ruthless and insulting to experienced professionals, but this looks like a good deal in my mind.

Earlier this year I attended a three day VariCamp workshop (www.hdexpo.net) and am reasonably familiar with the operations of this camera, at least enough to qualify for the technical aspects of this job. Perhaps my discipline as a cinematographer needs further refinement to be trusted with such a high calibar production, however, the ad only specifies "experience" with the camera... and that I do have.

The way I look at it: they are providing a $1000/day camera rental for three weeks use. In return, and in addition to a minimalist stipend, they offer access to all raw footage and an HD post facility for cutting a yourself a reel! ... in HD!

If what this ad offers is legit, then this might be a good opportunity for the right person. . . I would take it in a NY minute, anyways.

Brian

K. Forman · July 22nd, 2005, 06:40 AM

Ridiculous? More like living in a fantasy world if you ask me, but check out this "job offer", hot off of mandy.com!
Payment is on a lo/no/deferred basis.

" Hi, I’m looking for someone who would like to do camera work for a new professional hero reality show I am creating. This is basically just a real life super hero show (except the heroes don’t have super powers, since that is only in comic books and stuff whereas this is real life) which follows the adventures of real heroes fighting real villains and saving the day in real life.

Examples of things we will do are looking for villains by hanging out in the worst neighborhoods/ghettos of New York at 2AM or so where we’ll no doubt run into some villains such as gangs or muggers or crooks, and then we can defeat them and raise our prestige and maybe get some headlines. We could also say rescue people from burning buildings by just hanging out around the fire station and quickly jumping on the fire truck and then running in the building before the fire department can block it off. Then I’ll save some kid and win the key to the city, or something along those lines.

Unfortunately right now I can’t offer much pay, as I’m just doing this on my own with my own camera equipment and am doing everything out of my own pocket. For example, my budget is so low that although I’m a knight errant I can’t afford real metal armor so I’m just using plastic armor from the Halloween store for the time being, which is doubly bad for me cause now if I get stabbed my armor will do nothing to protect me and I’ll probably just bleed to death. Well maybe the stabber will miss my arteries so that’s what I’m counting on. "

Jay Gladwell · July 22nd, 2005, 06:49 AM

Keith, I hope this guy, and his foolish cameraman, have their wills in order!

Jay

K. Forman · July 22nd, 2005, 06:51 AM

I would love to follow them, just to catch the results on my cam!

Chris Hurd · July 22nd, 2005, 08:28 AM

That one had me going until I got to the plastic armor bit.

It ain't ridiculous unless it's legitimate!

Matt Champagne · July 22nd, 2005, 09:46 AM

Quote:

I would love to follow them, just to catch the results on my cam!

Yes...it would be excellent to be the camera guy...who do follows the camera guy who actually takes a job like that. Of course considering the insanity which they intend to produce...perhaps its good to get a good extreme telephoto lens.

James Emory · July 22nd, 2005, 10:07 AM

This sounds like a show for Sally or Ricki Lake. The next thing you know when he realizes he can't do the rescue thing he'll want to try to slay some dragons with his plastic sword. Maybe the Sci Fi channel would be interested in his idea.

Josh Bass · July 22nd, 2005, 11:13 AM

I'm with Chris. . .

I think that's a joke ad.

K. Forman · July 22nd, 2005, 02:38 PM

This is his website, detailing his quest-
http://www.heroicdestinysquad.com/index.html

I laughed my ass off... in a really sad way.

Chris Hurd · July 22nd, 2005, 05:22 PM

I think his site is a riot. Had a few good out-loud laughs just now while browsing it. Check this out:

http://www.heroicdestinysquad.com/ju...y/ayerhyne.htm

"Who rules the universe? Who is the creator of this reality that we’re in? Is this world just a byproduct of natural forces, or is it created by some sort of intelligent force? The answer is it was in fact created by an intelligent superior being, and that being’s name is Ayer Hyne. Ayer Hyne is a cyborg T-Rex with one real eye and one shiny red electronic eye, and machine guns for arms. He is also the creator of this world and the ruler of all reality."

The rest of that page is pretty interesting. I'm convinced that whoever is behind this was inspired by the brlliant "Ninja -- Real Ultimate Power" site at http://www.realultimatepower.net/. It's bizarreness is astonishing. Your friend here is just a wannabe in comparison.

K. Forman · July 22nd, 2005, 05:33 PM

HEY! My friends may have played D&D, but they are nowhere near as geeky as this guy... who is NOT my friend! hehehe

I just happened to find it in my daily search for work, and thought enough of y'all to share it :)

Patrick King · July 22nd, 2005, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chris Hurd

The rest of that page is pretty interesting. I'm convinced that whoever is behind this was inspired by the brlliant "Ninja -- Real Ultimate Power" site at http://www.realultimatepower.net/. It's bizarreness is astonishing. Your friend here is just a wannabe in comparison.

Proof that nothing good can come from a 13 year old with unfettered access to the internet during a summer school "Build Your Own Website" class.

July 22nd, 2005, 06:40 AM	#80
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	This one takes the cake! Ridiculous? More like living in a fantasy world if you ask me, but check out this "job offer", hot off of mandy.com! Payment is on a lo/no/deferred basis. " Hi, I’m looking for someone who would like to do camera work for a new professional hero reality show I am creating. This is basically just a real life super hero show (except the heroes don’t have super powers, since that is only in comic books and stuff whereas this is real life) which follows the adventures of real heroes fighting real villains and saving the day in real life. Examples of things we will do are looking for villains by hanging out in the worst neighborhoods/ghettos of New York at 2AM or so where we’ll no doubt run into some villains such as gangs or muggers or crooks, and then we can defeat them and raise our prestige and maybe get some headlines. We could also say rescue people from burning buildings by just hanging out around the fire station and quickly jumping on the fire truck and then running in the building before the fire department can block it off. Then I’ll save some kid and win the key to the city, or something along those lines. Unfortunately right now I can’t offer much pay, as I’m just doing this on my own with my own camera equipment and am doing everything out of my own pocket. For example, my budget is so low that although I’m a knight errant I can’t afford real metal armor so I’m just using plastic armor from the Halloween store for the time being, which is doubly bad for me cause now if I get stabbed my armor will do nothing to protect me and I’ll probably just bleed to death. Well maybe the stabber will miss my arteries so that’s what I’m counting on. " __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us

July 22nd, 2005, 06:51 AM	#82
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	I would love to follow them, just to catch the results on my cam! __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us

July 22nd, 2005, 08:28 AM	#83
Chris Hurd Obstreperous Rex Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: San Marcos, TX Posts: 27,366 Images: 513	That one had me going until I got to the plastic armor bit. It ain't ridiculous unless it's legitimate! __________________ CH Search DV Info Net \| 20 years of DVi \| ...Tuesday is Soylent Green Day!

July 22nd, 2005, 11:13 AM	#86
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	I'm with Chris. . . I think that's a joke ad. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

July 22nd, 2005, 02:38 PM	#87
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	This is his website, detailing his quest- http://www.heroicdestinysquad.com/index.html I laughed my ass off... in a really sad way. __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us

July 6th, 2005, 09:57 PM	#76
Craig Seeman Inner Circle Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Brooklyn, NY, USA Posts: 3,841	Yup folks. Spend $5000 on gear and you can work for . . . . $6/hr! Hey, if you're good you can get more responsibilities! Knowing that the cost of living in NYC is on the high side I'd guess you'd only get $3 for Florida. Now I included the contact email just incase you might want to send your resume. Does McD's now require I buy my own broiler for the burger flipping job? Seeking cameraperson with own equip. (high-quality DV, lighting, mic) for metro NY-area documentaries. Responsibilities could expand as project develops. Email resume to film@tuffcity.com. No phone calls please. this is in or around Manhattan Compensation: $6/hour

July 6th, 2005, 11:08 PM	#77
James Emory Regular Crew Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,892	Another utterly ridiculous offer. Thanks for that one Craig! Ha ha ha!!

July 10th, 2005, 05:25 PM	#78
James Emory Regular Crew Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,892	The whole crew with gear is an internship. Now that's an interesting angle. Be sure to check out the last line. I made it bold so it would be easier to see. Ha ha ha ha.!!!!!! "Music Video for major new artist this weekend. Crew needed: Camera person (with 24P camera) AC Lighting AD Audio Extras: that look between the ages of 11 and 20. Male & Female DJ Job location is Atlanta Compensation: Experienced 24P Camera person - Contact us. Extras & Crew - no compensation This is an internship job"

July 22nd, 2005, 06:49 AM	#81
Jay Gladwell Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 1,244	Keith, I hope this guy, and his foolish cameraman, have their wills in order! Jay

July 22nd, 2005, 10:07 AM	#85
James Emory Regular Crew Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,892	This sounds like a show for Sally or Ricki Lake. The next thing you know when he realizes he can't do the rescue thing he'll want to try to slay some dragons with his plastic sword. Maybe the Sci Fi channel would be interested in his idea.

July 22nd, 2005, 05:22 PM	#88
Chris Hurd Obstreperous Rex Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: San Marcos, TX Posts: 27,366 Images: 513	I think his site is a riot. Had a few good out-loud laughs just now while browsing it. Check this out: http://www.heroicdestinysquad.com/ju...y/ayerhyne.htm "Who rules the universe? Who is the creator of this reality that we’re in? Is this world just a byproduct of natural forces, or is it created by some sort of intelligent force? The answer is it was in fact created by an intelligent superior being, and that being’s name is Ayer Hyne. Ayer Hyne is a cyborg T-Rex with one real eye and one shiny red electronic eye, and machine guns for arms. He is also the creator of this world and the ruler of all reality." The rest of that page is pretty interesting. I'm convinced that whoever is behind this was inspired by the brlliant "Ninja -- Real Ultimate Power" site at http://www.realultimatepower.net/. It's bizarreness is astonishing. Your friend here is just a wannabe in comparison. __________________ CH Search DV Info Net \| 20 years of DVi \| ...Tuesday is Soylent Green Day!

July 22nd, 2005, 05:33 PM	#89
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	HEY! My friends may have played D&D, but they are nowhere near as geeky as this guy... who is NOT my friend! hehehe I just happened to find it in my daily search for work, and thought enough of y'all to share it :) __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us